My dear Aquarising

There is nothing wrong with your English. You can and you have expressed your thoughts very clearly.

I will try and work on a reading for you, or discuss your situation outside the realms of a reading - whichever feels best.

I can truly say, though, that I do understand the situation you are in. I do very well, indeed.

Dear Aquarising,



Very wise and, I must say, a realistic approach on your part. I know it is not easy to keep the silence and the state of no-communication, but please muster the courage to keep the momentum going. In time, you will be pleasantly surprised what you have achieved within yourself an enormous strength. The thought that makes you sometimes feel or realise that you are trapped in your own ‘self- deception’, as you put it, is once again a realistic and a healthy self-critical approach. It is only by viewing things under this type of light – well, not necessarily undermining yourself – but being critical of your own self, that you may see the true picture of what you are really looking for in this ‘connection’ that you have with this guy. Mind you, I did not use the word relationship, even if it feels like one to you.

.

‘Forget it’, ‘Move on’…. These are such easy things to say by others, aren’t they? They are not in the same situation and they do not feel what is going on inside you. Whether you choose to ‘move on’ or let nature take its course, are both difficult situations to be in. So, I would agree with one of your friends and your dad, that perhaps leaving things to nature or to the universe is the best un-forced action you can take thus giving yourself that emotional and spiritual ‘freedom’ to carry on with your life the best way you can. When we force a certain form of action upon ourselves, endurance, in my opinion, may become a lot harder than believing in life, nature, or the universe to shape things up for you.



Yes, my dear one, I understand your dilemma. It feels that way because you have feelings for him and I believe he has feelings for you too. But… a big BUT, as painful as it is, detachment from him seems to be the right solution for you for the time being. He probably has issues he needs to sort out within himself and I believe in this connection with the two of you, you come across as the one who is emotionally more mature than him. This does not mean, however, that you will suffer less; but perhaps you will be able to have better control on your life. No one option is going to be easier than the other, but within that maturity of yours you will be able to get on with your daily life.
Of course you wish to know if he is thinking about you; of course you want to know if he is missing you; of course you want to know if he is having a good (or bad) time away from you. These are natural and let no one make you feel guilty or bad for having these thoughts. However, as much as you can, try to build less and less on these ‘what if’ thoughts. I feel you want someone to tell you exactly what is going on through his mind. Well, if anyone can, let them be my guest.
I do however feel that he is not in a good place emotionally and spiritually.

You have to look after your own well being now. Please believe me you have to. I speak from personal experience and please do not take the role of a martyr or the role of the Samaritan.

There is a small spread which I would like to use for a reading for you. This is ALL about you my dear and not about him. You are my and our concern now and your well-being is important to us.

The spread is called: My Priorities Right Now.
Rider Waite deck.

The question to be asked is self-explanatory: What are my priorities right now?

1. Main Priority right now.
Two of Wands.
To choose between two situations which I feel you are already doing now. To make that choice and look ahead at the future with all its possibilities. Whilst making that choice, also to be sure within yourself that world is your oyster and there are so many opportunities for your own personal development.

2. What is blocking you?
Queen of Swords.
Someone in your life, or the personality traits of someone like the Queen of Swords, is or are being an obstacle in your further progress. This is a person who does not get carried away with her feelings and is more of in tune with her brain than her heart. She tells the truth and does not care at times if that is hurtful to the other person. She can be too logical at times, so much so that her attitude can aggravate rather than have a healing influence. If this is not a person in your life, it could be this type of approach may be standing in your way.

3. Things you can change.
The World.
The realisation that every ending gives birth to a new beginning. The cycle of life never ends. To have faith in your own inner power and believe in your ability to bring changes about. You need to believe that the world does not end on one particular sport or an angle. It is constantly changing and in that change it is presenting you endless opportunities to find your own path. If you had been feeling constricted and unable to spread your wings, believe me you can and you should. The world is your oyster as the Two of Wands above gave you that same message under a different light.

4. Things you must accept.
Queen of Wands.
That you are who you are: a wonderfully able, charismatic woman, who has a great head on her shoulders, able to compete and earn the respect of others; she can turn heads towards herself in admiration and respect. We tend to lose our self-esteem when we find in a situation of complex emotional upheaval and in that we lose our own self worth. The Queen of Wands is that one particular woman in a tarot deck who does not suffer fools. Please do not forget that you have these qualities and it is time you recognised them or got back in touch with them.

5. How things will progress?
The Lovers.
You will feel complete; you will find love and you will be able to make the right choice for yourself. The sense of completeness within yourself will leave no doubt for you to make the right choice. Whether this is in love or in making the right choices in life ahead.  ‘Choice’ will also mean understanding and being able to choose what is right or wrong for you.  I am not at all discounting the fact that The Lovers card also stands for a loving, wholesome relationship.

I do hope you get what you feel is most right for you in your present state.

With many blessings to you.  

Repost due to some typo errors. Sorry.

Dear Aquarising,


I am not contacting him because I assume he will only repeat what he has told me. Sometimes, through instant messenger or social network I know that he is feeling awful too, though it can mean something other than love or heartbroken... maybe regret?
On the other hand, I can't help suspecting that I am trapped in my self-deception. Okay, now I know that my mind is swinging between ‘what if this and what if that’ as you said.

Very wise and, I must say, realistic approach on your part. I know it is not easy to keep the silence and the state of no-communication, but please muster the courage to keep the momentum going. In time, you will be pleasantly surprised what you have achieved within yourself an enormous strength. The thought that makes you sometimes feel or realise that you are trapped in your own ‘self- deception’, as you put it, is once again a realistic and a healthy self-critical approach. It is only by viewing things under this type of light – well, not necessarily undermining yourself – but being critical of your own self, that you may see the true picture of what you are really looking for in this ‘connection’ that you have with this guy. Mind you, I did not use the word relationship, even if it feels like one to you.

This time, some part of me wants to handle it in a subtle way and let things stay vague. Another part of me has noticed some kind of pattern in this relationship and believes that it is supposed to be on & off. Some of my friends told me not to wait, move on. Only one of them, and my dad, said that let nature take its course.

‘Forget it’, ‘Move on’…. These are such easy things to say by others, aren’t they? They are not in the same situation and they do not feel what is going on inside you. Whether you choose to ‘move on’ or let nature take its course, both are difficult situations to be in. So, I would agree with one of your friends and your dad too, that perhaps leaving things to nature or to the universe is the best un-forced action you can take thus giving yourself that emotional and spiritual ‘freedom’ to carry on with your life the best way you can. When we force a certain form of action upon ourselves, endurance, in my opinion, may become a lot harder than believing in life, nature, or the universe to shape things up for you.

You really get the picture of where we are right now. Something’s has to be changed but I don't know what it is and how to. We have tried to avoid contacting each other. I tried to let my feelings die, find someone else and something else to do. They didn't work, so I guess they are not the right solution. And yes, if I have a friendship with him, I believe that the conflict of friend/lover will come back again. So... am I in a dilemma?

Yes, my dear one, I understand your dilemma. It feels that way because you have feelings for him and I believe he has feelings for you too. But… a big BUT, as painful as it is, detachment from him seems to be the right solution for you for the time being. He probably has issues he needs to sort out within himself and I believe in this connection with the two of you, you come across as the one who is emotionally more mature than him. This does not mean, however, that you will suffer less; but perhaps you will be able to have better control on your life. No one option is going to be easier than the other, but within that maturity of yours you will be able to get on with your daily life.
Of course you wish to know if he is thinking about you; of course you want to know if he is missing you; of course you want to know if he is having a good (or bad) time away from you. These are natural feelings and let no one make you feel guilty or bad for having these thoughts. However, as much as you can, try to build less and less on these ‘what if’ thoughts. I feel you want someone to tell you exactly what is going on through his mind. Well, if anyone can, let them be my guest.
I do however feel that he is not in a good place emotionally and spiritually.

You have to look after your own well being now. Please believe me you have to. I speak from personal experience and please do not take the role of a martyr or the role of the Samaritan.

There is a small spread which I would like to use for a reading for you. This is ALL about you my dear and not about him. You are my and our concern now and your well-being is important to us.

The spread is called: My Priorities Right Now.
Rider Waite deck.


The question to be asked is self-explanatory: What are my priorities right now?

1. Main Priority right now.
Two of Wands.
To choose between two situations which I feel you are already doing now. To make that choice and look ahead at the future with all its possibilities. Whilst making that choice, also to be sure within yourself that the world is your oyster and there are so many opportunities for your own personal development.

2. What is blocking you?
Queen of Swords.
Someone in your life, or the personality traits of someone like the Queen of Swords, is or are being an obstacle in your further progress. This is a person who does not get carried away with her feelings and is more in tune with her brain than her heart. She tells the truth and does not care at times if that is hurtful to the other person. She can be too logical at times, so much so that her attitude can aggravate rather than have a healing influence. If this is not a person in your life, it could be this type of approach may be standing in your way.

3. Things you can change.
The World.
The realisation that every ending gives birth to a new beginning. The cycle of life never ends. To have faith in your own inner power and believe in your ability to bring changes about. You need to believe that the world does not end on one particular spot or an angle. It is constantly changing and in that change it is presenting you endless opportunities to find your own path. If you had been feeling constricted and unable to spread your wings, believe me you can and you should. The world is your oyster as the Two of Wands above gave you that same message under a different light.

4. Things you must accept.
Queen of Wands.
That you are who you are: a wonderfully able, charismatic woman, who has a great head on her shoulders, able to compete and earn the respect of others; she can turn heads towards herself in admiration and respect. We tend to lose our self-esteem when we find ourselves in a situation of complex emotional upheaval and in that we lose our own self worth. The Queen of Wands is that one particular woman in a tarot deck who does not suffer fools gladly. Please do not forget that you have these qualities and it is time you recognised them or got in touch with them.

5. How things will progress?
The Lovers.
You will feel complete; you will find love and you will be able to make the right choice for yourself. The sense of completeness within yourself will leave no doubt for you to make the right choice. Whether this is in love or in making the right choices in life ahead.  ‘Choice’ will also mean understanding and being able to choose what is right or wrong for you.  I am not at all discounting the fact that The Lovers card also stands for a loving, wholesome relationship.

I do hope you get what you feel is most right for you in your present state.

With many blessings to you. [/b]

Repost due to some typo errors. Sorry.

Dear Aquarising,




Very wise and, I must say, realistic approach on your part. I know it is not easy to keep the silence and the state of no-communication, but please muster the courage to keep the momentum going. In time, you will be pleasantly surprised what you have achieved within yourself an enormous strength. The thought that makes you sometimes feel or realise that you are trapped in your own ‘self- deception’, as you put it, is once again a realistic and a healthy self-critical approach. It is only by viewing things under this type of light – well, not necessarily undermining yourself – but being critical of your own self, that you may see the true picture of what you are really looking for in this ‘connection’ that you have with this guy. Mind you, I did not use the word relationship, even if it feels like one to you.



‘Forget it’, ‘Move on’…. These are such easy things to say by others, aren’t they? They are not in the same situation and they do not feel what is going on inside you. Whether you choose to ‘move on’ or let nature take its course, both are difficult situations to be in. So, I would agree with one of your friends and your dad too, that perhaps leaving things to nature or to the universe is the best un-forced action you can take thus giving yourself that emotional and spiritual ‘freedom’ to carry on with your life the best way you can. When we force a certain form of action upon ourselves, endurance, in my opinion, may become a lot harder than believing in life, nature, or the universe to shape things up for you.



Yes, my dear one, I understand your dilemma. It feels that way because you have feelings for him and I believe he has feelings for you too. But… a big BUT, as painful as it is, detachment from him seems to be the right solution for you for the time being. He probably has issues he needs to sort out within himself and I believe in this connection with the two of you, you come across as the one who is emotionally more mature than him. This does not mean, however, that you will suffer less; but perhaps you will be able to have better control on your life. No one option is going to be easier than the other, but within that maturity of yours you will be able to get on with your daily life.
Of course you wish to know if he is thinking about you; of course you want to know if he is missing you; of course you want to know if he is having a good (or bad) time away from you. These are natural feelings and let no one make you feel guilty or bad for having these thoughts. However, as much as you can, try to build less and less on these ‘what if’ thoughts. I feel you want someone to tell you exactly what is going on through his mind. Well, if anyone can, let them be my guest.
I do however feel that he is not in a good place emotionally and spiritually.

You have to look after your own well being now. Please believe me you have to. I speak from personal experience and please do not take the role of a martyr or the role of the Samaritan.

There is a small spread which I would like to use for a reading for you. This is ALL about you my dear and not about him. You are my and our concern now and your well-being is important to us.

The spread is called: My Priorities Right Now.
Rider Waite deck.


The question to be asked is self-explanatory: What are my priorities right now?

1. Main Priority right now.
Two of Wands.
To choose between two situations which I feel you are already doing now. To make that choice and look ahead at the future with all its possibilities. Whilst making that choice, also to be sure within yourself that the world is your oyster and there are so many opportunities for your own personal development.

2. What is blocking you?
Queen of Swords.
Someone in your life, or the personality traits of someone like the Queen of Swords, is or are being an obstacle in your further progress. This is a person who does not get carried away with her feelings and is more in tune with her brain than her heart. She tells the truth and does not care at times if that is hurtful to the other person. She can be too logical at times, so much so that her attitude can aggravate rather than have a healing influence. If this is not a person in your life, it could be this type of approach may be standing in your way.

3. Things you can change.
The World.
The realisation that every ending gives birth to a new beginning. The cycle of life never ends. To have faith in your own inner power and believe in your ability to bring changes about. You need to believe that the world does not end on one particular spot or an angle. It is constantly changing and in that change it is presenting you endless opportunities to find your own path. If you had been feeling constricted and unable to spread your wings, believe me you can and you should. The world is your oyster as the Two of Wands above gave you that same message under a different light.

4. Things you must accept.
Queen of Wands.
That you are who you are: a wonderfully able, charismatic woman, who has a great head on her shoulders, able to compete and earn the respect of others; she can turn heads towards herself in admiration and respect. We tend to lose our self-esteem when we find ourselves in a situation of complex emotional upheaval and in that we lose our own self worth. The Queen of Wands is that one particular woman in a tarot deck who does not suffer fools gladly. Please do not forget that you have these qualities and it is time you recognised them or got in touch with them.

5. How things will progress?
The Lovers.
You will feel complete; you will find love and you will be able to make the right choice for yourself. The sense of completeness within yourself will leave no doubt for you to make the right choice. Whether this is in love or in making the right choices in life ahead.  ‘Choice’ will also mean understanding and being able to choose what is right or wrong for you.  I am not at all discounting the fact that The Lovers card also stands for a loving, wholesome relationship.

I do hope you get what you feel is most right for you in your present state.

With many blessings to you. [/b]

Hi,


I don't know what I can say to express my gratitude, dear Cedars.
Your kindness, opinion and words have given me positive energy.
Yes, it is hard to keep the silence but I think it is time for me to lay
back and recharge, also examine what I have been doing in this
'connection'. I am okay with this word. It is suitable. When I said
relationship I didn't mean in a romantic way or 'we are together'
either.  

Until recently, I thought that he is the more mature one because
of his experience, family background etc. How do you know that
I am emotionally more mature than him? Now I just realise that
perhaps he is afraid to express emotions. I am pulling myself
together, finding peace within myself. Feel that I am getting
stronger and that everyday is a giant step. Hope that doubtful
thoughts and dominant behaviour won't find me again so soon.
However, I am worried when you say that he is not in a good
place. I wish I could help, or at least someone else would, if I
will only make things worse. Thank you, I won't let anyone make
me feel guilty and will try to put the focus back on myself.



Here is something that I want to response to your reading:

1. Main Priority right now.
I am not sure if I have made that choice or am still making.
Or there are more than one choices to make? Maybe a path has
just slowly reveled itself to me!

2. What is blocking you?
So far I haven't seen this person or someone who has this kind
of personality. Will keep in mind and be ready to deal with.

4. Things you must accept.
I do not quite understand 'suffer fools gladly'. Is it a merit?


At last I want to thank you again for your understanding and for
shedding light on the situation. They are really helpful.

May all the support and guidance you have given bring back
blessings to you.