You are 35, and I think you shall take a time out and evaluate your situation.

I don't think we shall use any cards for advices here, because your decisions will have an impact on your whole life, and must be yours alone.

From what you are telling us, will I strongly advice you to not include this guy in your future plans.
He has abandoned you at least twice, and even if you get his child,
will this not be the "glue" that will connect him to you, rather the opposite.

Be sure you want the child for the child sake, and not in the hope that it will bring him back to you.

It is a sad story, but sorry to say, you are not the first, and will not be the last who experience it, love can be cruel many times when not mutual.

I wish you all good for the future, whatever choice you take, and give you a big Grandpa hug.

Clarissa  If you read back on what you have written, how would you advise someone else in this situation, does it sound to you after reading this mans history that he is a good catch honest and reliable. Sometimes in life we have to put are emotions aside and think purely from are head
The decision to keep the baby must be your own but I will ask you to consider that any actions you take to involve others like his family, will not bring him back to you, he may even resent you, pushing you further apart, which isn’t really what you want if your keeping his baby he may at a later date want to be part of his life, so keeping things as friendly as they can be is the only advice I can give you.  
                             Blessings Decia
I will repeat what Rhutobello as already said  “Be sure you want the child for the child sake, and not in the hope that it will bring him back to you.”

A child is made out of Love not a bargaining tool If the baby looks like his father will you love him or resent him in later life! I’m sorry for bring this up but it does happen!

It is interesting reading your message. My husband, Duncan saw it posted on his computer and pointed it out to me. You are only a few days younger than my son.  He is having lots of problems with his wife, who moved out with their children about six months ago.  She has been seeing another bloke ( she says they are only friends) for some time and has been away for the weekend with him on her own.  My son is obsessed with her and is giving her every penny that he can lay his hands on and she's not refusing any of it.  She has only to say jump, and he does it.  She is breaking his heart.  All his family are worried about him, but he won't dump her.  He knows thats what he should do but he won't do it.  She only wants him for his money.  You will notice the similarities with your situation.  My advice to you is to dump your boyfriend and make a life for yourself and your son.  If you stay with your boyfriend he will only use you.  He's only interested in what's best for him.  There will be someone else much better out there for you, but you won't find that person while you are being blinded by your feelings for your boyfriend.  Believe me, he won't get any better - he'll just get worse.  The longer you leave it until you get rid of him, the harder it will be.  Go for it - you can do it.  Trust your instincts.  Ask the universe for help and it will be given to you.  Please keep in touch and let me know what you decide. Remember to ask for help, if you need it.  You don't have to do this on your own.  Both my husband and I will send you some Reiki to help you through this difficult time.

With love and light,

Jill

xxx