I am an old member of this forum and come here whenever I am tensed. I am 21.5 and am very depressed these days. I sometimes feel so depressed that I wish visiting a psychiatrist or consultant.

I am studying online. Waiting for my degree to complete. I have lost interest in studies. Dont feel like studying from home. I have one more year to complete before I can apply somewhere regular for a MS. I wanted to know something about my education and career. Conditions in family and house are also very troublesome. A reading on that will also be appreciated. Pls

Thank you

Hi Sunshinez

How are you?

I pulled a few cards for your for a general outlook of your present situation and internal/external influences that may be affecting it and the possible outcome if plans go ahead.

You: The Tower rev.
Right now, the cards show that the structures of achievement, authority, ambition, and power are collapsing in your heart and mind. You are feeling disoriented as if nothing makes any sense anymore and as if everything is in ruin and as if nothing can be built anew. Uncertainty and confusion is the order of the day for you right now. You are wondering why everything is dark around you and you feel powerless to bring life back into your world and to regain control over your life.

Uppermost on mind: The Moon
Right now you feel a little overwhelmed by everything you are feeling and fearing and sensing within you. It is like an overdose of anxities and at the same time a wallowing in some kind of dimly lit area. You don't really know how to come out of it, but you sense that there is a way out. You are just not sure how to get there. Emotions are clouding your thoughts and making thr night look darker than it really is. Remember the moon is bright and lights up the darkness. Are there some memories from your youth or childhood that are bothering you and causing you to doubt or fear for the future....?

Future hopes: The Empress rev.
Deep inside you, you possess a great creative potential and a desire to create and develop your talents and projects from scratch. For some reason, though, you are now doubting your creativity and your ability to build up all the things you ever wanted to in your education and career. You have within you a strong force that is pushing you to build and to create and to give life to ideas and plans, but right now apathy and negative thinking is getting the best of you and the creative force inside your spirit is lying dormant. Instead of hoping, you are doubting. But all the potential is still there. Nothing has changed within you. What you knew you had in the past, you still possess!

Surrounding environment and people: Two of Swords
In your home, defensiveness is the rule of day. Swords refer to communication and words more than actions. The issue here lies in mis-communication or the unwillingness for anyone to lower their guard. Nobody wants to get hurt and as a result, everybody is putting up a fence around themselves, even though in reality, there is no enemy.... It is all in everyone's mind. This situation is making you feel isolated and alone. You feel as if you have to deal with everything you are going through - discouragement and depression -- on your own. The environment around you does not appear supportive. You feel as if people in your home are blocking you from expressing your thoughts and your self. As if they don't want to hear it or see it.

External influence ( which you may or may not be aware of): two of Cups
Is there a relationship between two people around you from which you feel excluded? the cards show that a relationship between two people is affecting you and may be related to what you are going through right now. It seems that the relationship in itself is harmonious and good and happy. That's why I am cnfused here as to why this would contribute to making you feel the way you feel right now? Are you upset that this couple is together? Is this related to any of your parents being with love partner? Or is another couple?  If you haven't thought or known about it before, this card perhaps asks that you re-think the whole situation to look at the root of your current feelings and issues.

Advice:  Knight of Cups rev.
The cards are telling you that right now you need to think carefully about your reality not only with emotions but more rationally. This card shows that you have a tendency to idealize things and to fantasize in your attitude and you tend not to be too much in touch with reality. This is what makes you feel lonely as well because your expectations are very high and it's alsmot impossible for any human being ( be it you or family members) to meet them. I sense that perhaps also your view of one parent ( the mother??) needs to be re=thought because perhaps you tend to put that parent on a pedestal and this affects everything you do. You are very sentimental and very loving and caring as a person. You have a giving heart and are quite intuitive as well. The cards show that it is more your way of thinking that needs to be made positive... everything will follow from there. It's your point of view that needs to change and you will see that life is great and you have al the potential. I sense if you apply for a graduate program, the chances are high that you'd get accepted. But remember we manifest our thoughts and positivity needs to be more present in your life.

Hope this helps and that I had a connection to you.

Thanks farafina.

All your reading are very true. Except for this one


External influence ( which you may or may not be aware of): two of Cups
Is there a relationship between two people around you from which you feel excluded? the cards show that a relationship between two people is affecting you and may be related to what you are going through right now. It seems that the relationship in itself is harmonious and good and happy. That's why I am cnfused here as to why this would contribute to making you feel the way you feel right now? Are you upset that this couple is together? Is this related to any of your parents being with love partner? Or is another couple?  If you haven't thought or known about it before, this card perhaps asks that you re-think the whole situation to look at the root of your current feelings and issues.


I am not sure if some relation between a "Couple" is bothering me. Say it be a harmoinous relation. However there are realtions that are bothering me a lot. bu they cant be termed to be harmonious.

Lastly the advice thing... The problem to all my tensions is that I have been thinking more rationally and practically. I was a happy go around person who used to live in the practical as well as happy mental world as well. but now I have changed. Disappointed from selfish behaviours, very hurt from attitudes because I myself am not such a person.

Before I apply for a posst graduate degree. I need to complete the degree i am doing now. I have one year towards its completion and I dont even feel like studying. I loose interest in my work and studies very soon.

House problems are taking over me. Can some card tell me if there will be some improvements in my problems?

Thanks

Thanks for responding to your tarot reading.

As you know, the cards only serve as symbols that reflect or speak to your own energy.

Not being in your shoes or situation, I only look at my cards and transmit what I feel they are showing. It is truly a humble effort as I am not an expert at this and only try to share certain skills I happen to have.

You said "Can some card tell me if there will be some improvements in my problems?" and I feel that based on your cards, all the signs show that YOU can make improvements happen because it is all about your perception of things.
You MAKE and CREATE your own emotional reality. You have STRONG FORCE within you, it shows, and your happiness is in your own hands.
No matter what, the cards show that you cannot affect others and you cannot make changes in other peoples' life. But you can change your life.
And it is now time to turn away from a purely emotional outlook on your environment and to look at things from a longterm and visionary pointof view.
The future is very bright for you on ONE  condition: YOU must make it bright.
At this point in your life, improvements depend on you and you only.

I hope I helped clarify my above reading and I am sorry if my reading was not clear enough. Perhaps there are some clues in the cards drawn that the future will allow you to discover in your own time.

It may be a good idea to consult with a doctor about your feelings of depression. It could help you immensely.