Hi
I am a sag lady, born London, 6.12.1955,
Usually very happy, go lucky, full of life. I have been in a  relationship for the past 5 1/2 - 6 years. We have been living together for about 4 years. And with each year that passes, things have gone from bad to worse.
Im not sure if i'm just living in hope that things will change,
or if im scared of making the change (by leaving)
or scared of being alone again (I was widowed 17 years ago)
my partner is so full of hate and anger (fuelled by alchol) I think I just live in hope that things will change????
If anybody can help, as my mind is in constant turmoil?
thank you

Hello Lambtail

I picked three cards for you and am wondering how they relate to your situation and question.

This person who is now suffering from alcoholism, was he a loving and a gentlemanly person? He offered you love and you took it in good faith at the time?
The world is your oyster out there Lambtail: do you want to take it? Do you want to leave him and embrace the wide world out there. Did this guy at some stage love you and now in his addiction have you considered rehab or whatever it takes? I got the World card as the second card and it is up to you if you want to leave.
Furthermore, as the High Priestess card suggests, perhaps go within yourself and seek the answers for your future with this guy. Do you want to live in self-denial and secrecy about this situation or do something about it or him?

I felt I got stuck and picked another card for clarification and I got the Knight of Wands: There is an energy in a young man who brings good tidings and fertile ideas. Could this be some hope for your man for recovery or someone entering bringing you a message of hope that something can be done about him?

cedars

thank you for doing the tarot card reading for me.  In answer to your questions, did he love me, I think he did, (does) as much as his nature can allow. He has only had 2 previous long term relationships, 12 months, and 18 months. Which is pretty sad as he is 44 years old. When I met him he hadn't drank for 4 years, apparently previous to that he was pretty bad with drinking, so I guess no women would stick around.He started to drink again when his previous girlfriends name got mentioned at a BBQ. He thought he could handle a few drinks a day, but as time went on, the couple of drink a day, grew to half a bottle of scotch a night, then half a cask of port a night. I tried telling him many times that he was drinking too much, but he dosn't want to listen. He has cut out the scotch, and now only drinks a few beers, and aprox a cask of port every two nights. He is a very deep person, shy, insuecure, and likes the relaxed state of booze. He dosnt realise the monster he becomes.  And dosn't think he has a problem, until he realises he has a problem, there is nothing I can say or do. So i guess rehab is out of the question.
In response to your second card, I think that is what is going on at the moment. I am in turmoil, as there is no happiness, I love him, but the way he is now, I cannot see any future for us together. And I am trying to make sure the decision that I make, is the right one, and that I don't regret the decision that I make. I know that I am not happy, my whole existance is miserable. So that card is basically what I am doing at the moment.
As to the last card, I hope is brings good news, and fertile ideas, could it also mean, help for me? as well,
I would like to thank you once again, for your reading, and I live in hope, that my life will improve, as I know it will, once all the sorting out has been done. which ever way it goes.
thank you again

Best of luck to you for the future. I know it is a complex situation and I believe if it is meant to be, it will be. Look after yourself from now on.

Hi lambtails,

We are a bunsch of guys and girls that tend to help eachother a whole lot more than what others think.

I haven't ventured into doing a reading for you,

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. In my lifespan until today, i have probably spent 80% under the influence of alchohol. I absolutely stopped drinking coffee or tea(until now), because my first drink was poured probably about 4 in the morning, i'm a guardian of the night(insomniac)

In any event, nobody could do anything to convince me i was on a distractive course. It was common knowledge that no-one should do business with me after 9 in the mornings!!! It was also said that i was standing with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel.

the biggest danger to any person becoming an alcholic, is sitting idle, or pretending to have their "own bussiness", but it mostly operates from crisis to crisis, or instability at the workplace and or losing his "job" frequently, because everybody else is wrong? I wonder if these are some symptoms?

At your age, and being a spritely lady, I think, you need to start becoming selfish, take that which is important to you, and, measure everything around you to this yardstick.

Another approach, if looking at the last couple of years, say 3, do you want to spend the rest of your life like that?

I think you have already spoken, pleaded and all the tears that goes with it, is not always worth it. Furthermore your relationship has most probably "broken up" many times? and just a unpleasant rollercoaster.

Yes, people are by nature "group animals" it's a safety zone for all of us, a support structure and just a huggy bear influence (i hope you get what i mean) cottonwool feeling. So it's sometimes very difficult to actually break ties, and beyond that point a sense of loneliness will envelop you. This can be overcome by having friends around you, not hanging out in bars or anything, well i think youv'e had your fill of that already. nor, being on a limb or rebound, getting in a relationship to quickly again.

In any event, it is ultimately up to your partner, he needs to really lokk at what effect he has on people around him. He will always be in denial of the fact that he destroys that which is the dearest and most precious in his life. I look at it this way, many men would buy the wife a little car or a housewife car, nothing wrong with it. When changing the tyres, it must be the cheapest on the market, his most precious family is being supported by second grade strips of rubber which is in contact with the road for about 12 inches alround, is this acceptable?

Sorry about the looooong way, maybe, you are the one that will get him to a point where he would understand, that drinking is not good for him or you and your relationship. What we then look at is for him to really make up his mind, we can't really give you advise, remember, the Tarot will giveyou a set of possibilities, but will also give you a set of do's and dont's.

The life of a alchoholic is to unstable to really predict his next move.

I am thankfull to the Gods that I saw the damage i was doing, the upping and downing, when you're drunk, you loose your inhibitions, creating chaos. Today i talk about it, never bothers me, but because i own two Restaurants, liqour is available at any time, sometimes it really takes a will of steel not to have "only one". This is the biggest mistake and downfall of any alchoholic.

This is a lifelong clinical dissipline you need to apply to yourself. Now, my parner, never a very big drinker has a few beers some nights, mmmmmmm, big problem, i hate it with a passion.

So, I wish you all the best, see what will happen and take the step to improve your own life, circumstance, and happiness.

Blessed be