No, not freaked out lol  Life seems so wierd when one tries to piece it all together.  I think I'm gonna try looking up info on that dying at sea thing again for me, got a few ideas that may help last night while I was falling asleep

yes I quite agree with the problem with the RW tarot pack  , I find it quite offensive!the energy is awful for some reason. My view is that there are probably many things we bring in from past lives whether from this dimension or other planes or dimensions of existence, I feel that the things we most dislike may be there to help us in some way, for instance when I was a child I couldn't stand the colour orange, it made me have a headache and I felt like throwing up when I looked up at orange street lights, however now I am using it as a primary healing colour for myself to help with arthritis in my knees and menopause and catarrh and to lose weight !!!!!!!!! so maybe the things that you have the most aversion to are actually trying to help you in some way that will become important in later years.

I can't imagine using the RW tarot deck.  I hope that what you belive about that isn't true lol that it may be trying to help me.  I've been sick enough :P  I don't need nausea on top of it lol.  But at least I'm not the only one out there that finds it "offensive".  Thanks for the input!!