Sweet,
It looks as though you are in luck this time, as I have several reading requests pending ahead of your own which require further information from the member concerned before they can go ahead. I therefore thought that this was an excellent opportunity to give you the in depth reading which I promised in my previous posting. The term "in depth" refers more to the entire reading process which I am using behind the scenes so to speak, and consequently only a minute fraction of my total efforts on your behalf will actually appear on your computer's monitor. You are definitely only seeing the tip of a huge reading iceberg, being displayed on your screen.
And a very raw and sore iceberg it is!
Now I am fairly certain that you know the identity of the person who has triggered these feelings of love inside you, but you are instead asking hypothetically more with regards to reading his deeper, inner nature or determining what feelings he has for you in return. Of course to be able to do this directly would necessarily require me to go down the third party road. Something which I am not allowed to do according to the forum rules about the serious moral issues which would be necessarily involved in us invading the privacy of someone else's thought and feeling space without their knowledge or written permission to do so.
Is this love energy which is working inside you, or is it instead your spiritual need to feel loved for being the wonderful and kind woman whom we know that you already are, without necessarily always having a man by your side to remind you of this on a daily basis? And what is this love energy anyway, other than perhaps a mixture of animal passion and lust as well as the life force which flows through and sustains our very existence? I am a firm believer that if something is really meant to happen to us in this life it somehow and sometime eventually will, but determining whether or not it was predestined that you met him at this particular moment in your life (even if this was possible) is not going to be of any use to you in deciding whether this is the right path or best course of action for you to be taking in your own best interests, as well as his.
You say that you are currently being overwhelmed with messages from your Higher Self that you are headed down a very different path from what you would have thought was the wiser one only months before, and that friends and family may not understand why you seem to now be on the surface at least rejecting the values and beliefs which have so far made you the person whom you are to the world at large. On one hand you state that you are like this reader who lives most of his life in his head thinking about all of the many possible things which could go wrong in an instant if you take the risk with this relationship, then virtually in the next breath you berate and criticise yourself for feeling this tide of passion and intense emotions engulfing you, and allowing your emotions to get the better of your powers of good judgement.
How does one tell the difference pray tell me, between the small and often subtle voice and inner promptings of their Higher Self, and the doubts and fears of their Lower Self which has the main purpose of ensuring our survival on many various levels at the same time? This lower self of ours operates mainly out of fear of our own extinction, so how do you know that the voice that seems to be telling you that this meeting of personalities was always meant to happen and that therefore you must automatically be following the correct path for you is not in reality the expression of your inner survival fears that you are somehow destined by cruel fate and your karma to be permanently single in a world where everything seems to be built around couples and families?
So what I have written above is a small proportion of all the questions which flowed through my inner mind both when looking at your initial request, as well as during the reading itself. I am certainly not expecting you to answer these questions for me on this public forum. Neither am I inviting you to reveal this personal and deeply private information to me through a private message or email.
Unfortunately, there are as usual far more questions than there are and probably ever will be definite answers to your questions, with all your inner voices competing for your attention and careful consideration all at much the same time as each other. No wonder then with you having all these various inner voices shouting at you constantly, and telling you things which are apparently in direct contradiction to what the other voices are telling you that you feel so confused and scattered in your energies. Somehow you need to get some temporary relief from all of your inner voices, so that you can begin what could potentially be a long and difficult process of making your voices more comfortable with the fact that this is a world full of uncertainty and contradictions.
The right path for your optimum growth and development as both a spiritual and human being may not be the smoothest path when it comes to you ultimately find the deep and lasting type of love which I feel you so deserve to have. Another way of saying the same thing would be to say the just as is the case with life, love was probably never meant to be easy, and if challenges continue to be placed in our paths it does not immediately follow that these are road signs telling us that we are going the wrong way for us, or that this meeting was never meant to happen.
I sense through your reading that you actually have very little conscious choice not to go ahead with this relationship and see where it leads you. The real risks always involved in beginning any new love relationship are more than counterbalanced by the also real risk that if you do not go ahead that you could quite unintentionally be throwing away one of your last opportunities to be loved for whom you are deep inside.
You could easily by backing out of this relationship in embryo, due to your understandable fears of not having your feelings hurt ever again by any person, unconsciously penalise yourself to a life of constant and unrelenting regret, in knowing that you never believed in yourself enough to have the courage to find out for sure whether in fact this is the right path and person for my confused and shell shocked internet friend.
Even a hardened psychotic killer has the legal right to be presumed innocent until proven guilty beyond all reasonable doubt in a court of law. What terrible crimes have you therefore committed to make you want to continue to be your own judge, jury and executioner? The question for you to think long and hard about is why commit your heart to a prison life sentence with no chance of release when you have so much love in your heart to give to this world.
Not every man or woman feels that he or she deserves to accept the precious gift of love which you are giving so freely of yourself to any person who recognises the inner sweet behind the mask which you present to the outside world. Not every man or woman is yet prepared to accept your gift (with there being so many different other types of love beyond romantic and sexual), but does this mean that you should stop offering it if or to whom you chose to?
This reading basically is saying that you potentially have far more to lose in terms of significantly reduced self confidence and self respect by NOT going ahead with this particular relationship, than you would ever stand to lose by moving forwards with it, with faith and courage as your constant travelling companions.
You have I sense far more to gain of lasting value to you including beyond this one lifetime, with regards to you becoming stronger within yourself by moving forwards with this relationship, than you put at risk by deciding never to move outside of your normal comfort zone and becoming permanently single by your own behaviour of building a solid protective wall around your heart, which not even love or light can ever penetrate.
Not only do these emotional walls efficiently keep out things which could harm us, but they also simultaneous and non selectively keep in things which could harm us, as well as keeping out the very good feelings from other people which we so badly and urgently need to eventually tear them down (as they are no longer required), one brick at a time.
Blessings of love and endless respect to you, from your Aussie friend,
EoT
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