If this was your intended goal then I wish to assure that you were more than successful in making this crystal clear to your reader.

Your postings show too much depth of thought and maturity for anyone to fail to recognise that you are definitely not a new soul mate every week (or every day) type of woman.

Hopefully you will eventually be able to find a man whom you will want to spend most of your time with, who also wants a cat around the house.

Why make these two mutually exclusive - your soul mate or the cats?

Go for both, I say!  

Now you have really started me going about one of my favourite subjects or pet hates about close relationships in general.  

If you make the common error of attempting to spend all of your time with each other you will quickly drive each other crazy, and could unintentionally spoil what was otherwise a beautiful relationship, because you are still individuals with your own separate friends, interests and ambitions outside of and apart from your relationship or partner. Ask any couple who have been forced by their situation to be with each other 24/7, and see what they have to tell you about it being anything other than a bed of roses. No matter how head over heels you are in love with each other both of you need time out from each other now and then, in order to keep your relationship happy and healthy and long term.  

I am now finally getting down off my soapbox and putting it away (I am sure that you are relieved to hear that as I do tend to rave on at times) as I feel that you already know all that I am telling you, but perhaps the same information may be of help to someone else who looks at this, so I hope that you will not be offended by me leaving it here as part of my response to your posting.

I feel with you that I may be preaching to the converted?

See you next reading,

EoT

lol of course you have to be a strong woman on your own and have your own life then that means the one you meet is an addition not half of you
it's this time of torture thats killing me, there is no closure but no progression i just cannot take it any longer i dont think anyone i know has been in a situation quite like mine! and the problem with text as an initiative to a realtionship these days means noone really knows what the other is thinking, im in some kind of stalemate i cant get in fully or out of lol, hopefully some resolution will come soon cause its playing with me something rotten! xxxx

Dear Missbelieved,

I have read your message, have taken what you have said on-board, and am unusually sensitive to or empathise strongly with how frustrating and upsetting this apparent stalemate is to you as my friend.



It is always easier said than done, but please do not allow this to make you believe that things will never get better.

You are made of a much stronger cloth or come from a stronger stock to ever permit this to hold you back.

Your immense inner strength, quality and depth of character and sheer determination (some of your harsher critics would regard it instead as stubbornness) to keep trying in spite of the obstacles which are placed in your path were clearly evident from your reading.

But that same inner strength which I feel is your greatest asset, is I freely admit being sorely tested over the longer term.



Probably not exactly, as they are not you. While I quite understand that you might feel that way, with due respect I do not see your situation as being anything unusual.

To be loved for whom we are and share the love which we feel in our hearts with that one special person in our life is possibly one of our most urgent spiritual needs.

Why should we therefore feel ashamed or embarrassed to want to satisfy that need and human longing?

We are after all social creatures by our very nature.



Amen to that.

Isn't it both ironic and sad that a major advance technology which was claimed to have been created specifically in order to bring people closer together, frequently achieves the complete opposite result because of its very stop and start highly abbreviated nature? I am not sure that it was not a backward step, instead of an advance to develop this gadgetry.

Person to person relationships in the same room still rule in my book.

But with the frantic pace of our modern 21st century lifestyle plus the increasing need to travel further to get a decent paying job, text on cell phones, in internet chat rooms and on internet message forums such as this one are only a poor second or third best when compared to the real thing.

Do you know the chorus to the Beatles classic song "Eleanor Rigby?"

Songwriters: McCartney, Paul; Lennon, John;

http://www.elyrics.net/read/b/beatles-lyrics/eleanor-rigby-lyrics.html

All the lonely people.....

And this was many years before cell phones and the internet were ever invented, and subsequently went public (1960s).

It was an explosive, social problem long before the technological age was born, which has only got much worse as time moves on, against the claims of its creators.

At best they can only serve as an introduction, or appetiser before the main course.



Once again with respect to your womanly feelings, the evidence to the contrary is staring you as well as myself as your reader and friend, squarely in the face.

Be kinder to yourself,

EoT