My best guy friend of 8 years has just stop talking to me.....im devastated over this!

We just started hanging out more and talking for the past couple of months.....weve been helping each other with his recent breakup and the death of my bf.  we have always been attracted to each other but timing was never right
Since we have been hanging out I think weve started to have feeling again  well atleast on my end....he gives mixed signals all the time. Anyway, hes a very sensetive person and takes everything to heart...well the other day his ex txted him and when he told me I asked if he was going to answer her..he said he might.  So I was to say the least disappointed and kinda backed off in a sense with short answers amd hardly talking to him...then I really put my foot in my mouth and when he told me he was going to a friends house to hang out...i said have fun with him and the ex...he said ahe wasnt going to be there...i said I didnt care either way...and that I didnt care what he did.  So since then he hasnt talked to me....hes never ignored me before and its driving me crazy...i have had contacted with him as im letting him cool off but id like to know if things will go back to the way there were or if I just lost a great friend...im not sure if im ready for it to be more or not but his friendship means alot....i really do care and I dont know how to fix it.  If anyone could help with this I would so greatly appreciate it!!! Also maybe some insight on if we may possible be more one day!!!  Sorry for any typos as im on my phone  lol

Addtional info....his bd is july 2 1983

Dear Krystal,

Please accept my sincere condolences on your still very recent and significant loss of your boyfriend Chris, in a car accident which happened on August 20th of last year.

 

When any traumatic negative event happens in our lives, and the loss of a loved one is commonly accepted to be at the top of the list when it comes to the amount of long term emotional disruption and devastation it can cause, nature has a merciful way of deadening our feelings so that we are still able to function reasonably effectively and do what immediately needs to be done to make any necessary funeral arrangements and to ensure that our lives continue relatively normally in a world of which he is no longer physically a part.

With Chris's passing into Spirit only having happened fairly recently, I would be amazed if your feelings have even recovered from the initial shock of losing him without talking about your extended period of healing which must inevitably follow. Each of us grieves in our own unique way and time and nobody can say with any degree of authority what is normal or abnormal for that particular person who has been affected by losing someone whom they loved almost as much as or possibly more than their own life.

Nobody therefore can say just how long it will take for your feelings to return to anything close to their usual level (if they can ever be considered normal again), and I sense through your reading that you are viewing what has now happened with your best guy friend of eight years through a type of emotional haze which is the product of nature's anaesthetic.

It is clear from what you have told us that G (your best guy friend) is also going through his own dark night of the soul with being forced to choose between you and his ex, after having just got you over the worst period of your mourning for a relationship that has been so suddenly ended at least on the physical plane as my good friend and fellow Australian StormGirl Blue has previously explained to you in her gentle and wise response to your cry for help in the Dream Interpretation forum.

I am unable to directly read G's thoughts and intentions towards you in the light of what has happened since his ex has come back into the picture, as they would require me to give you a third party reading which I am not permitted to do, according to the relevant reading forum rule which applies to any reading given on this site about any other person than the valued member who requested it.

The referred to rule and others can always be viewed and must be read and agreed to before you are eligible to make your request in a sticky which is pinned near the top of the appropriate board.

For the Psychic Reading forum (as each reading forum has its own set of rules) this posting is called..............

***Please Read BEFORE Requesting Your Psychic Reading...***

Quote:

7. Please do not ask for readings for others or third party readings, instead ask the person to join Mystic Board themselves, once they have contributed to the community by posting and introducing themselves they are much more likely to receive a successful reading in return.

Since I feel that it is highly unlikely to impossible that G is going to become a member of this online spiritual community and personally request a reading from us, this course of action is permanently blocked.

But that does not mean that I am either unable or unwilling to give you a reading concerning this sorry situation of having now it seems lost two of the most significant men in your life, in the space of only a few short months. However I must caution you that any predictions or insights which are obtained through this more indirect method, tend to be on the average far less accurate or reliable when compared to if I had been able to use the third party route.

This is your reading, and not Chris's or G's, and anything which comes through me on your behalf as part of it comes indirectly through your ongoing relationship with both of these men (including your spiritual relationship with Chris who is now on the higher side of life, but who is still closer to you in his spiritual body of light than the distance and time between two of your own heartbeats). For whether it is a long term friendship or a matter of the heart, once such a relationship has been established your energies are forever intertwined with theirs.

The scientists call this phenomenon "quantum entanglement", but I prefer to call it spiritual love or think about each of us as being a small but vital part of or node in the complex web of two way energy exchanges which exist between all living animals and plants on this planet, as well as with the Earth itself.

If you are scientifically inclined, please read the following article. If you are not don't bother, as it is only likely to cause you further confusion and unnecessary stress in trying to understand what is being said here, on top of everything else you are having to cope with at the moment.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_entanglement

But I have left out one more person at least from the overall picture, and that is G's ex. Basically he is being held to ransom by his ex, as well as the energy relationship he still has with her. And it is like he is being torn apart between the two main women in his life, with each expecting everything of him, and him not being able to satisfy either no matter what he does or does not do with the healing intention to bring peace and civilised behaviour to the proceedings.

And accordingly what you are seeing on the surface in this now at least four way energy relationship between Chris, G, G's ex and yourself is only the veritable tip of the iceberg towards you fully understanding its mechanism and dynamics. What you see with your physical senses is only a mere and insignificant fraction of what is going on deeper down in the collective unconscious which binds all four of you to one another.

If I could predict exactly how I believe that this energy relationship is going to ultimately pan out over time, I would be the richest reader on this planet, as people would soon wrongly start to believe that I have a private telephone line to God, by which I can know everything which God does about every single soul (past, present and future).

While such a belief might be seen as flattering to me and to my intuitive gifts, I must confess to everyone reading this that I do not have such a divine telephone line, I have no ambition or intention to be regarded as the greatest psychic in the world (or even to be thought of as being a psychic because of its often negative connotations).

And if I did have this mythical telephone line to the Almighty, my limited human mind would probably suffer a catastrophic and fatal breakdown, within less than a millisecond of God explaining everything to me about what has been happening in the past, what is happening now in the present moment, and what will be happening to the energy relationship between the four of you in the short to longer term future.

I sense through this reading that during the next six months or so that the energy relationship you still have with Chris will deepen and change in nature. While he will always have a place in your heart, I am sure that he does not want you to stop living your own life in the process. I am not a medium myself but my bet would be that Chris would above all want you to be happy and to enjoy your life to its fullest potential.

While he knows how much you miss his physical presence, he does not want you to put your own life indefinitely on hold for him. Honour and respect his memory by being all you can be, and by thinking about what you feel Chris would have wanted for you as a form of guidance, and as a compass to help you make your decisions.

Although I know that you do not want to hear this now, it is felt that regardless of whether G decides to come back to and communicate with you again, it would only be as your friend, and nothing more than that. My feelings are that he will continue for some time yet to be of two minds as to whether it would be better to choose one of you over the other, as it is not possible for him to go back to live with her, but still remain your male friend as his was in the past.

There is much more I feel still to play out between G and his ex in their ongoing energy relationship which likely has its source, long before you ever came into the picture. Indeed I feel that relationships from past lives are involved here (between G and his ex), and that you are consequently a relative late arrival in their two way cat and mouse flow of energy mess.

It is difficult enough for me to predict what I would do if I were G and G was me, without even having a clue at to what his eventual decision will be. If I were a gambler or betting man (I am quite the opposite), my money would be on G going back to his ex, whether or not he actually lives under the same roof as her.

Over time (more time than you are probably willing to wait), it may be that G's ex's hostile attitudes towards you will gradually soften, and you will be permitted to be his friend again (but be watched at every move as a hawk would for any sign that he is planning to betray her trust in him not to make you his mistress). The big question now for you to consider is how long you are willing to continue to put your feelings on hold while waiting for G to decide between you, and if he does choose you over his ex what she could be capable of doing in getting revenge for "stealing" him away from her (not that it would be stealing if he had consciously decided that this was for the best).

While this attempt to get your friend back is still in transit, you would not be then able to fully give your heart to another man in the romantic sense. So what do you want more? A fair weather friend whose ex is out to extract a kilogram of your flesh at every turn in revenge for you interfering in something which she feels is none of your business? Or are you going to look in your life for what Chris would have wanted you to be and have, and what he can no longer give you without a physical body.

Give your body, mind, heart and soul proper time to heal over the next six months, do not pursue G with the intention to force his hand (easier said than done), and do and be everything that Chris would have ever wanted you to do and be. There will be days when something perfectly innocent will prompt a flow of healing tears from you, but let them come as it has been proven scientifically that tears of grief actually carry poisonous chemicals safely out of our bodies to stop them causing permanent damage and further illness.

Take comfort and draw the extra strength you will undoubtedly require during the coming months from your ongoing love for Chris (and his love for you which will never die), as well as your spiritual beliefs and the loving and caring of your friends and other family members. And remember that within the rules of this forum I am always here to offer you a reading if and/or whenever it is required.

As well as a shoulder to cry on when it all gets too much, and the world and everyone else's expectations that things will ever be the same or "normal" for you once again, weigh you down. I am not here to tell you what to do (only offer you friendly and helpful advice in order to make your task an easier one), or to judge you. I sincerely hope that you will not only come to me as your reader, but also as your friend.

I leave you now with a poem which I have magnetically attached to the left side of my desktop computer tower, and which helped me to get over the death of both my parents in 1989 and then my mother in 2006.I hope that it might help you as much as it definitely helped me to deal with my loss on both occasions.

"Death is just an open door"



[Author: Cliff Cullen 1997]

It can also be viewed at the following web address.

http://www.stargazerdownunder.com/general/reading/door.html

Love, Light and Healing,

eye_of_tiger

Thank you so eye of tiger.....you words really helped shed some light on the situation both with chris and my guy friend!  Im still in the grieving process and need to work that out before jumping into something else even though ive known this guy for years.  His ex isnt  (that i know of) in the picture again...shell txt him out of the blue sometimes....hes kinda been pining for me for a long time and has been waiting for things with chris to end and i always picked chris over him.  Im happy though as long as the guy friend will be apart of my life in any aspect.  Even though im starting to get mad at him for ignoring me but I believe in second chances and theres a reason for everything (atleast i tell myself that  lol)

I have no doubt that me and chris are connected in some way....even though i havent felt his presence or seen him in any dreams lately...i know that hed want me to be happy like he did when he was here.

The guy friend being a cancer is very emotional person and im sure I hurt his feeling more than I ever have and hes retreated into his shell...I could be wrong or he got back together with the ex and doesnt want to tell me cause hes knows what im gonna say.....they had a very bad relationship from the start....she is the only girl that hes ever broke up with.  They were engaged too...and its funny seemed like they got engage when I told him that me and chris were gonna finally get married...this is all assumption but its still funny  lol.

Anyway sorry for rambling but just wanted to thank you again for your reading and for the poem....I have saved it to my desktop

I'll use my science and be very brief.

To fix things between both of you, TRY. Unless we are ourselves trying to achieve something, we can't ever get it. With a fully sincere heart, if you try to fix the problem, it will get fixed.

You both may also have a thing more than friendship, but for this, you both have to let your selves connect in that way. You have to initiate it, for example, and he must not resist you after you have done that, and the relationship will turn into something more than friendship. And vice-versa. You could also both initiate it at the same time, and then it is going to look beautiful!