Not sure if anyone could help me here, but basically I am having a few troubles with the way my new family is turning out. I am a recent newly wed, expecting our first baby this month. I do not intend to make myself seem greedy or selfish, but my mother in law(husband's mother) has been worrying me. She seems to be closest to my husband from all of her 3 children. I know they have a strong bond with each other, but at the same time I am the wife and feel the need to have some authority here. She seems to always have some input in our relationship, and wants us to move in with her. As far as having a place to live, this is something me and my husband have to decide on our own but he seems to listen to her inputs and advice instead and I find this disrespectful as a woman and wife who is starting her new family.

Can anyone give me some advice on what to do? I don't want to create any issues. It will be very appreciated thank you.

By the way I am new here;

Moving Reading forum.

Congratulation on your marriage.

When we marry, then we combine not only as man and wife, but we also combine several families, with those benefits or problems that gives.

You have just married your husband, and you might have known him for a 2-4 years.

His mother have known him since his birth, she has carried him, supported him, cleaned him, and when you get your own child you will see this is not a feeling you can throw away on its matrimonial day, if ever.

To take up a fight with a mother in law, is many times the first step to create unrest in your own family, remember each time you complain to your husband...then it is his mother you are complaining against...so be sure you have a good reason for it.

Try to discuss this thing with him calmly.....tell your feelings without it comes to complaining (attack), and if you love your own mother, try out your complains on yourself as if your husband complained toward her.

As always our Brain is our strongest tool.....if you tell yourself that your mother in law is "demanding and unfair", then she become demanding and unfair, because you will only look for such a thing.
If you tell yourself that I will now try to learn to know her, try to befriend her, then I think you will get a good "partner" that are willing to help out in times when you have the need for it, and life will become much easier.

Don't let the relationship with her become a "dogfight", you are BOTH very important for your husband....but each must know that none can own him alone...but share....and all will win..and hopefully that is what he will do with your family too!

Good luck to all of you

thanks so much for your response I really appreciate it! I really hope me and her can get to know each other more on a deeper level. Her relationship with her other kids isn't that great, that is why I assumed she wanted him closer along with our baby. He's her closest son, so hopefully I can put this behind us, respect and accept each other.

I just had to come back to this topic and say something! Hope i am not intruding on your reading rutobello but may I say something to anna??


YOU WIL BE LAUGHING IN A COUPLE OF MONTHS ABOUT THIS TOPIC,