I find myself yet again at a fork in the road. Which way should I take? should I leave all I know and start anew? Or stay and branch out here?

For a little back story.......My father just recently passed away. I moved in with my mom to help out. I lost my job. and now am offered a job far away. However.  am unsure what to do. Any insight would be wonderful.

Welcome back Jerusha,  

Firstly I wish to express my sincere condolences to you on the sad occasion of your father's recent passing.

I am not a trained medium myself, but I am almost 100% certain that he would be very proud of and grateful to you that you are taking such good care of his wife and your mother during this difficult period for all three of you, although I feel that he is probably equally concerned as I am that you are placing undue pressure upon yourself to be able to do this as well as you appear to expect you should.  

When I gave you your previous reading on March 8th of this year, you were talking then about the possibility of having to go to Portland.

As I never received a response to my last reading at least on the forum itself, and cannot seem to remember ever getting a PM (I apologize if you sent one, and it has simply slipped my mind), could I please ask what if anything happened about you doing that?

I would like to check up with you first before giving you another reading at this time (in order to avoid repeating to you what I have already written there) that the place far away in which you have now been offered this most recent job and Portland are not one and the same.

In your reading in March you were obviously hoping to find something other than just another job in Portland (you were looking for love).

Is the place far away Portland, or is it somewhere entirely different this time?

Thanks,

eye_of_tiger

It isn't Portland. I decided to stay here at home instead of going to portland. As dad was ill and I was needed here. The job is on the other coast. In Maine auctually.

Thanks for getting back to me so fast with your answer, and I hope that it did not unintentionally come across to you as me being insensitive to the grief you are experiencing on having recently "lost" your much loved father, whom I feel is still very much with you and is watching over and protecting you both now from Spirit.



But in order to get this job in Maine you are not necessarily required to leave behind everything and everybody which or whom you once knew. It is true that you will physically then be at a distance from your mother and emotional support network, but both your parents and the positive values they gave you when you were growing up are now within and are an important part of you, wherever you may go.

Another way of expressing this is that I feel you somehow need to find the most comfortable balance for you between feeling as though you need to give up everything which has given your strength and comfort in the past in order to achieve your career ambitions, and on the other hand only giving up what you no longer feel is in your own and your dear mother's best interests, to be replaced hopefully by something even better.

Yes often achieving anything which is important to you in this life requires each of us to take certain calculated risks (not simply doing something silly or dangerous) in order to claim our just reward, but the idea is to build upon what you may have only felt you were leaving behind, which you have now as the sociologists say internalised or taken within you along with you.

I feel that you are seriously underestimating your mother's ability to recognise that you can still help her in a new way by getting this job in Maine, although the physical distance between the both of you will present it's own challenges. Challenges which you are both I sense more than capable of overcoming. Your mother as well as yourself are both much more emotionally vulnerable at present, but neither of you is lacking in intelligence or resourcefulness.

Actually nature in it's infinite wisdom temporarily tends to numb much of the pain we would understandably be experiencing at the loss of our loved ones, precisely to allow us to function reasonably effectively and to be able to make major decisions such as this which need to be made in spite of us having to continue to learn to live in a world of which those people who we previously thought we had lost forever to death are no longer physically at least a part of. Who said that life was ever intended to feel or be equally fair to everybody at the same time? We all at times appear to be students in the school of hard knocks?

My feelings on the basis of this reading are that you owe it to yourself as well as both your parents to give the application process for the job in Maine as much time and effort as you can comfortably spare while still feeling that you are doing what your mother is not temporarily able to do for herself, then to have enough faith that if it is indeed meant to happen then it will. Without knowing the qualifications and relevant work skills of any other applicants for the same job I am hesitant to now be making any predictions one way or the other, at least those which will be worth you listening to.

If you are given the opportunity to prove to the employer in Maine that you have what it takes to get the job done well and on time, then I feel based on your reading that you will not need to leave behind or give up even a small fraction of what you obviously seem to believe that you must in order to make this separated living arrangement work.

I feel that you will either sink or swim with this job in Maine depending largely on how able and willing you are to practically use what is now such an important part of you from your upbringing, with the intention to make an honest living as well as to be everything which you feel you are expected to be as a provider to both yourself and to your Mum.

While I cannot put a definite figure on your chances of getting the job in Maine, I feel that if you do get it then it will be primarily up to you to find the most comfortable middle road approach for you to take between leaving anything which feels important to you behind you, or on the other hand being unwilling to leave anything behind you because of the ever present risk involved that for some unforeseen reason which does not generally include anything which you did or did not do, things do not work out as well as you hoped they might. Feel the fear but do it anyway if you are given the opportunity by becoming the successful job applicant on this occasion for both your sakes, and not only for your mother's?

Kindest regards,

eye_of_tiger