Stale Romantic Life, Mysticism, reading, forums, Numerology, Sun Signs, Divination

Posts: 42 · Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 1:18 am

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Posts: 4135 · Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 3:21 am

Firstly with regards to the forum rules about requesting a reading within your first posting, it is left entirely up to the reader and his or her own inner guidance to decide whether they feel that the request is especially urgent, and just as importantly whether they feel they can help the person concerned. In my opinion your request is a desperate cry for help from a deeply wounded heart, and without necessarily having to give you a formal reading with Tarot cards and such like, I do believe that I have something useful to say to you, which might make your period of waiting for the woman who loves you a little easier.

I do not see any useful purpose in constructing theories as to what you may have or not have done in a past life. Karma is not a system of punishments and rewards, but is more designed as a series of learning opportunities based on the ways in which we have responded to past experiences. The guiding purpose is not to punish us endlessly for making mistakes (which we all make) which we cannot even remember making (hardly seems fair), but what is in our best interests in owing and developing as spiritual and human beings. While I am not denying that there may be reasons in some past life for you to still be alone at the age of 26 years in this one, I suspect that it has very little to do with God judging you, and in some way finding you wanting. That is all I wish to say on the subject of past lives, as I feel that we need to focus more on this one?

When I read your posting where you said that and I quote:

Quote:

At times I feel so worthless I just wish I'd die.

....I am to be completely honest with you deeply concerned as to why after two years of treatment by a qualified professional therapist even mentioning the possibility of ending it all when there is so much love and happiness in your life to look forward to. I know that you probably did not mean what you said (you are in great emotional pain at the moment, and therefore you would not be human if you did not think this way at times), but thoughts do have a power of their own and if you find yourself thinking increasingly of ending your own life, even if you are not actually making plans to do it, the pain of being lonely could have been made much worse by some underlying medical condition with which you are already suffering, or even in some cases depression is a possible negative side effect of the very drugs your doctor has prescribed to treat your condition. If you will only do it for me as your friend, please get immediate advice from your doctor ASAP, if suicidal thoughts become more regular.

If two years of therapy have not helped you, perhaps it is through no fault of your own. I do not know whether or not you went into this voluntarily, but many therapists I have consulted have their own favourite pet theories about why a person who is as good and decent as yourself has such a low sense of his own self worth. If their pet therapy does not work, they often blame you instead of changing their methods of treatment midstream.

I also do not know by whom or what your self confidence had essentially already been destroyed before you entered therapy. I only recognise that you are falling into the common trap of judging your self worth by the presence or absence of another person. To share the love you have to give with at least one special person and feel valued and respected in return for being the wonderful person whom you undoubtedly are is I believe your greatest spiritual need, so why should it be surprising to anyone that at 26 years of age your patience is rapidly running out.

For various personal reasons up until the age of 25 I had myself thought very little about the opposite sex and dating was until then completely out of the question. I had my first date in late January 1978 and by early 1979 I married my current and only wife. This January 6th, we will have been relatively happily married (not without the inevitable conflicts and disagreements) to each other for 29 years, and have two adult children 25 and 21 yo respectively. The reason for me mentioning this is mainly to show you that there is always hope for late developers such as ourselves. Many men and women these days choose to leave it later than they once did to marry and start a family, so even though you did not choose to remain single, there is less pressure from society these days to become a husband and/or father before we are 30. This means that you have at least 4 years more to go (according to my calculations) to even reach the new average.

There are I feel too many half people running around desperately looking for their other half, so that their pain of being lonely will finally be taken from them. Take it from me, human relationships involve the coming together of at least two whole people, not two halves. By measuring your own self worth through another person, you are unintentionally setting yourself up for a life of ongoing unhappiness where if you cannot get the type of loving you so badly need, you will settle for whatever is on offer rather than being alone indefinitely. My suggestion to you is to get clearer in your own mind as to what personal qualities you are looking for (and those you could not live with) in a woman, then go to the sorts of places where you would most expect to meet her. Do not wait for her to magically appear on your doorstep, but get out there amongst people once again.

I am not for a moment telling you that this process is going to be easy, and with your low self esteem I sense that you may need professional advice and support as well while doing this, but the only other option as I see it you have is to become so involved with your job or other areas of your life that you would deny yourself of what love and happiness is your spiritual destiny. It is true that some people seem to be destined never to marry or have a mate, but in many cases this is because God has a higher purpose for their lives which does not involve having their own family or children. I am not saying that you are one of these people, but I am simply mentioning this as being one of countless possible reasons (none of them involving punishment for past lives) why you are also a late developer with regards to matters of the heart, as I once was.

Begin your healing by becoming your own best friend,

eye_of_tiger