For the past 4months of my life i have being living a lie to the person that i love the man that i love ......i lied to him about who i was, what i had,what i look like, every thing i ever told him was a lie except my love him......
I did not think he would love me for me and who i was and for what i looked like every day that went past i tryed to tell him but i couldnt he was so happy i runied his life from all the lied i told him, I finally told him the truth about who i am adn he say's he still love's me because he fell in love with who he was talking to and i don't think i am good enough for him i am no body really i could write for hours about this , I just need help in what i should do im so sorry for what i did to him i love him with all my heart but some how i know deep down there will never be me and him....

Dear lostlife,

My goodness, you have just encountered your own 'instant Karma!' Have you ever heard the expression: 'What goes around comes around?'
I gather this was a romantic internet relationship?

It sounds like the life's lesson here is: TO LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF! For exactly who you are.
You have some serious work on learning to love yourself to do!
Making up a fictious character to hide behind on the illusive internet has come back to haunt you! Now you can deal with it!


Just for the record, you do NOT have the power to ruin anyone's life unless they choose to let you!

Blessings to you! You can work through this. . .Linda

First things first... you need to accept who you are first and find the root cause of why you have this negative perception of yourself. This is probably the hardest thing in life to do is to really look at who we are and understand the choices that we have made.

Every action we do now is prologue for the future. Only you can change the way you feel about yourself.

You stated that this guy didn't fall in love with the persona that you created but the person you truly are....if this is true then you should accept that and build from what you do have.

Maybe there is a lesson here you need to learn...but it is only for you to understand what that lesson is and just a clue I don't think it is about discovering a relationship with this person...I think it has something to do with discovering you.

Sophe

Dear Lostlife,

I have to share a story that is dark out of my past that is similar. I got married at eighteen years old to a man that I loved with all of my soul.

He was in the Navy, and on the aircraft carrier U.S.S. Kitty Hawk. Back in those days Vietnam was everywhere, and protests, and free love, and drugs etc. He was gone for ten months at a time, and I figured he was fooling around with the Phillipian women, and I was what was called a West Pack Widow. I used to be heavily into drugs at the time, and my friends were the Hell's Angels.

I ended up having a series of affairs, and I had to tell him the truth before he came home. He forgave me, and told me that he loved me. He left for another few months, and stupid me had another affair. Only, this time I became pregnant. I had to tell him again, and he still wanted me as his wife. We stayed married and moved on after his Navy duty was up. I felt so guilty. I killed myself with guilt for years. Yet I loved him. Don't do the same thing that I did. If the man loves you, stay with him, and do as I did. Vow to yourself to always be honest from this day forward, and forgive yourself. FORGIVE YOURSELF! You are a worthwhile person, and everyone in this world has had lessons like these to learn. I will pray for you too. hang in there.

Love, Pamela

Thank you all for all that have writin back to me I am trying to for give my self so much I am trying to love my self and all that I am just having trouble trying to accept who I am I think.

I have changed my user name from "Lostlife" to "Sunshine" that is a start to my new life as i am trying to learn to love my self before any one can love me .............I am so confused on what i should do I mean this man that I had lied to is deeply in love with me and wants to have a life with me but some how I am scared and think I am not good enough for him as I could not be my self when i first met him but now he know's that whom I really am..........


Thank you all