I am starting to see the light again! I thank you for your kind words and suggestions in my efforts to solve the mysteries in my life. I am glad that I
decided to invest in the pendulum, as I think even though I knew the things which are surfacing, I needed confirmation; but moreover, I had to believe!

When my students begin meditation I always tell them to look for feathers.
I was doing some work with a student in Malta and I was talking about finding feathers, this being a start of awareness and he said how difficult it would be not to find some as he bred fighting birds on the roof of his house. We were having this conversation in his car, we pulled up at some trffic lights ( it was very hot so the windows were open) I looked up and told him to watch.
I held my finger out of the window and a tiny white feather came down and landed on the tip of it.
'That's what I mean about feathers,' I replied.
He was very quiet for the next few hours. But his training improved a lot.
So perhaps you are becoming spiritually aware? Have you been working on it? Has something happened to trigger it?

Thank you for asking! As you can tell from my previous posts, I have some strange happenings in my life in the past year or two.
It began when we removed an old tapestry from my deceased mothers home after a robbery. We removed it not because of its beauty or value, but because it had been in the family for longer than I could remember. I brought the picture to my home and I since then have had good, bad, and unusual happenings. I then developed a keen sense of smell. I could be riding down the road and strange smells would come across me. I once smelled "kerosene". I knew that there had been an old kerosene tank at my mothers and so I rode over there and it had recently been removed. Kerosene was all over the ground. I covered it up! The same day it was nearly 5pm still daylight, I was going to go inside to get some nails to drop them to prevent intruders from riding behind the house, as I went to turn the doorknob, It would not turn. I tried again and it sorta opened by itself. I felt the hairs stand up on my arms. I had a voice tell me "danger, don't go inside- don't turn on the lights"..I hesitated to go inside, but I flew inside, reached in a hall closet and grabbed the nails and flew back outside. I was probably only in the house for a second. Once on the outside, I realized that the house was totally dark inside which meant the hall doors were probably shut. I went and dropped the nails and returned the next day and all the nails within sight of the house were picked up. I had felt as if I were being watched. I told others about this and was warned to not go back by myself, that probably someone was inside the house and so I did not go for a long time.

Then prior to my sisters death in February 2006, I was with a friend riding. We came to an old building down town and my friend said look at those "pigeons" sitting on top of the building. There must be 100 or so! I said those aren't pigeons, they are crows.
We argued about the birds, they were black birds of some sort. My friend suggested that maybe that was an "omen" of some kind. I said maybe. A week later, my sister died! She was a very intelligent person with an IQ of a genius, yet she suffered from mental illness due to a bad situation that resulted when she was 18. She was gang raped and drug - 1975. The treatment she received back then due to her depression was electric-shock-therapy! A very bad thing! This kills brain cells which must be replaced with synthetic drugs. Over time, one builds up immunity and stronger drugs are needed, eventually causing damage to other important organs. She died 30-years, almost to the date, of her rape! During her 30-year period, she survived by reading about her illness and probable cures. She believed she had been cursed by god. She was a Christian and Virgin prior to the rape. Trying to help herself she explored with various religions and cures to include witchcraft.
Anyhow, since her death I have had many unusual thoughts and feelings. I felt the need to explore this and so I have began reading about and practicing meditation. I have been researching all avenues of possibilities of angels, guides, spiritual connections. I feel as if there is something that I am needing to know that someone is trying to tell me.

Hope this helps to give you a little more insight to my being where I am today. My search for more answers. I appreciate having been lead to the MysticBoard. I feel as if I have really spiritual grown since my first post, as a result of the help and leadership of others here. Thanks