me and this boy have been off and on for about a year now. i wud like 2 kno if i shud continue our "Relationship" and take it to the next level, or shud i break it off? this has been stressin me 4 soo long! sometimes he treats me well, and others idk wut 2 think? i juss wud like 2 kno if my future w/ him is even their? soo...can u help this sweet 16 teenage love?

teenage love in need of desperate help!! me and this boy have been off/on 4 like a yr now. im getting pretty sick of it. but idk wut id do w/ out him! is he really worth it? so wut i wud like 2 kno is do me and this boy have a future! ahg! 16 yr old love!!!!!

Dear Jasmine,

You say that you and this "guy" has been off and on for about a year now...but you are not saying who is breaking the relationship off or why...

Having said that....

Perhaps you can make a little account here and see how the Debits and Credits add up....

Everyone can live with someone else's good side, the question is ....can you live with his "irritating" side?  The reason I ask is because it is not going to change, chances are it will only get worse.

Also...many couples fall in love with each other because of certain traits, and then spend the rest of their lives trying to change these traits...

Let me give you an example.....You see, it was very cool (for instance) when he made eyes at you while he was with a previous girlfriend, but now that he is still doing that while he is with you, it beccomes a different ball game all together.  Or...you found his mixed up hair and his shirt hanging out of his pants attractive when you met him, but now suddenly he looks sloppy to you...  (these are just examples)....

Another thing you need to know is how the law of Karma works (in this life)....  You can never build your happiness on someone else's misfortune.  What was the circumstances in which you met?  Did he leave another girl for you, did he cheat on her with you?  Or did you leave a guy for him and in the process broke his heart?

The answers to these questions only you will know, but it might be the reason things are not stable between you two...

It could be also that one of you is maturing quicker than the other one, and now a game of control starts....Who will tell who how and what to do....  You are also both now at the age where you are establishing your identities, and the flood of hormones you guys experience at this age doesn't help....  

The good news though is ....."This time will also pass...."  So my advice to you is, "enjoy it while it lasts" and don't expect more than what is given.  

A true love relationship is not about give and take......that is trade.  A true love relationship is about give and give...because if both of you give spontaneously, then both of you receive what comes from the heart and not from a feeling of obligation (obligation = a feeling that you must do something).

If you really care about each other the way true love would have it....You would be more interested in how you make your partner feel, as opposed to how he makes you feel.  He becomes the center of your life and vice versa, and you begin to think about what you can put INTO the relationship instead of what you can get OUT of the relationship.

Again.... only you will know if things are like this with you two.  If not...then I suggest you learn the lessons from this relationship and just enjoy it while it lasts.

love and rainbows

Raka

It is and it isn't about age.  It is in the sense that many people will enter your life and it is important to be free to access your options.  It isn't in the sense that you know your own feelings.

Love is not binding by any of the characteristics of the person.  It is a free and empowering feeling from both parties.  Learn and grow in every relationship and allow love into your life in all its many faces.