I ponder on it sometimes: what was the lesson?

I wonder whether I might have owed that woman, maybe did her some major harm in a previous life, so that I had to pay her back by giving her all I wanted?  But I thought that the lifting of karma made your heart feel light, and mine sure didn't feel that!

Maybe me and the guy were learning more or less the same lesson - not to destroy yourself if you can't have what you want, if love is not given, or not returned.

Most of my experiences with love seem to have been on those lines.  I think my heart has now learned (due to a recent crazy experience!) that it is never wrong to love, whether or not it is returned.

Life is fun, anyway.  The strange thing is, while such things are happening, and you're suffering miserably, obviously you're not enjoying it.  But after, when it's all over, you're pleased to have been through it.  I am, anyway.  There's a kind of wow! I survived that!  Amazing!

I suspect I never wanted a quiet life, anyway.  You know Avril Lavigne's song, "Anything but Ordinary, Please"?  It always makes me laugh out loud, 'cause when I'm not feeling sorry for myself, that's just what I'm like, really.

Tish  


Yeah you have me wondering too,what was the lesson,i guess you wont know until all is done hey????
Maybe you did owe that girl,thats possible,its so hard to know which road to take in life.The bit about not to destroy yourself if love is not returned etc,that is a huge lesson,would be a very hard one at that,its very hard not to destroy in times of that situation.

And when you get through something like that,yeah your right,its a HUGE wow,look what i did,i can get thru anything.I know its a bit different,but like when i had my son,i couldnt believe i got thru it,and i felt so powerful after the birth,so proud i was strong enough.

I do know Avrils song hehe,yeah i feel like that sometimes,but i think my life is more like that song called "wheres my head at"  




Tamara :o)

 I don't know that one, "Where's My Head At"    It's not on my album, and I only have one by Avril Lavigne.  My music collection is not extensive!  I shall look out for it.

The other song, I have to admit, I quite often "laugh myself to sleep at night".  Mad as a hatter.

I know what you mean about when your son was born.  I guess childbirth is one of the experiences women share, that gives us a sort of "being tested" opportunity, aside from the total wonder of the little person who's been given into your care, just to you, to love and look after ...  Wow!

With my son's birth, it was just a total fiasco, my body didn't know what it was doing, and neither did I.  It was chaos.  I got a trapped nerve in my back so I could hardly push because of the pain, so they gave me an epidural, which had the result that I couldn't feel the contractions any more so I didn't know when to push, but the pain from the trapped nerve was still there!   Good grief!  They had just reached the stage of threatening me with an emergency caesarian, when I finally managed to get him out!  You know what did it?  They said, "the baby is in distress", and I think that made me somehow find the ability to do what needed to be done!

But when my daughter was born, it was a lot more textbook.  They knew I had problems with - what? - hormones not being produced in enough quantity to speed on the birth, so I had 3 doses of whatever-it-was (I've forgotten the name now), where apparently most people only get one, if it's needed at all.  And gradually my body managed to get on with it!  But there came a point where her head was "crowning", and I could feel that my body had reached its limit, I just couldn't stretch any more.  Then, suddenly, there was a kind of release, as if I just let go of all care or concern for self, because it was for her, and just pushed with all my strength.  Of course I tore, but you know, that's not exactly uncommon!
But that feeling, of putting self aside for someone else, filled me with wonder.

Most incredible experience in the world, having babies!  And don't we love 'em!

Tish  


Oh sounds like your labours were pretty hard stuff lol,i had a 7 hour labour,as soon as my water broke i burst into tears and said,nah i cant do it,help me,heeeeeeeelp  

But i got thru it,and it really does show you,because having babies are the most wonderful and WOW thing ever in life.That you can do anything if you have faith which i still lack and just use ur inner power.....Its just amazing going thru something like that and coming out with ur head held high and saying,oh lookie what i did lol,well thats what i was saying.

So yeah it is the Most incredible experience in the world,for sure......And yes we love em soooooooooooo much hehe

But oh my,i would of been freaking out if i was you,thats a very hard labour/s,but ur stronger for it hey......

 Oh, you do make me laugh! I know what you mean: "Heeelp!"

But yes, I guess we do feel that we're stronger for it. Just as well, really - getting ready for the next 20 years, which is the really hard bit ...  

My daughter is just at the stage where she is thinking along the lines of "I don't think I'll ever have a baby 'cause ... ooh, it sounds a bit too scary ..." But when the time is right, I guess she'll feel ready, just about. I used to feel exactly the same.

I ended up with pretty bad stretchmarks after my kids, but I call them my "tiger stripes" - my "colours", won for endurance!  

Life is fun!