At first I want to say that I am proud of you, because you really try to make things better.
That is very charming. This really is going to be a long story. I hope it will help you in many ways.

I do see you have had rough emotional start. What you call the Venus-line is actually a heart-line
that is been damaged in your early years. I am sorry for your heart-ache.
It seems the family-ties and contacts are broken. Yet you are in need for some-one you where you can feel at home.
Home is very important to you. I think it is your basic question in life. To feel at home. But later on that issue....

First,  when your heart broke your unconsciousness did two things:
In protecting yourself you decided to push every emotion related to that early event far, far away.
You can access the memory, but not the feeling. It became your surviving-style to intellectualize you emotions and situations.
Even the good emotions. So sometimes you miss out on the emotional level.

And the other thing that happened, that you have decided to keep people away from your heart.
You don't allow yourself to feel love for people. You don't give yourself space to relate and
deeply communicate with the people around you. So sometimes you miss out in having in-depth relations and keep superficial.
That can be lonely.

You are “ In the Netherlands call it : some-one who stares the cat out of the tree”.
It means that when you meet people for the first time, you are keeping distance, act a little cold and unwelcoming .
You really want to know,  who you are dealing with, before you open your heart.
This could making friendships hard for you. A lot of people share these traits, but with you they can really interrupt a satisfying life.

For the superficial people around you, you may seem cold, but in love-relationships, you seem overheated sometimes.
You are a fighting spirit with very clear and fixed opinions. You find it hard to empathize with the other person and have the tendency
to see your own perspective only. I do not think you apologize a lot! You always think you are right, and if you are wrong you won't admit it easily.
It would not be wrong to take a good look in the mirror sometimes, though. There are always two sides in a fight.
You are easily hurt, if others do not recognize and acknowledge your personality/perspective.
Then don't try to forget, that another person also has a perspective and emotions that earn the same recognition and acknowledgement.

Please do understand that I am NOT trying to criticize you, I think you are awesome.
But because your needs as a child have not been fulfilled completely, in some aspects, you have to learn some social and emotional skills yourself.

You can, actually!

I see, you already learned yourself a lot. You were able to make your own safety-net with the positive traits you have,
to balance out your negative traits. You can push this even further.

You have the quality to handle stress very well. You are a fighter! You keep vital, strong and confident in difficult situations.

Your have a not fully developed girdle of Venus which gives a softening effect on your emotions.
You can feel compassion for those around you, and have a sensitive nature to even out your broken and sometimes self-centered and stubborn heart.

You can see the big picture, and are able to see through difficult concepts.

You understand the human psyche very well, and are able to develop a lot of wisdom that will serve yourself but also those around you.

A ring of Salomon tells me you are able to feel unconditional love and have great spiritual strength and ability.
You would do very well in occult science or religion.

Thereby, you are very creative. I think it would be great for you to have a job that asks a lot of creativity. I think you will be successful.

You have honour. This will keep you human, honest and strong, and striving for the best you can get.

You are concerned (in a good way!) about having a beautiful house, it is very important for you to feel at home.
Also here is a quote that is written on your fore-head: A house is made of walls and beams, a home is made of love and dreams.
You are striving for both, and it is really making you charming, especially because you have had so much to deal with.

I think you feel more balanced out at home. When you mix in society you are seem to get in your head and rationalize.
At home you are more comfortable, and your heart seems to open and get more generous.
If it is possible I think you would do great if your job is at home. Maybe starting your own palmistry practice at home! )

I think you will be able to build a welcoming home. You really can make some changes.
You will make a new start in a few years, you will broaden your horizon.

You really do posses the qualities to fill in the gaps that you have had as as a child.

Some tips a long the way:

1. It would be great if you take a look in the mirror from time to time. And be honest with yourself, with your negative traits and also
honest in seeing your positive traits. If you after doing this, you conclude that you should apologize (maybe even to yourself). Do so.
It will take the negative energy out of your system.

2. Maybe it is weird, but it would be good to have a second puberty where you distance yourself from the past, be rebellious as hell,
question everything you learned so far, and find your own way.

3. Then the last step you could take, is to learn how to control your emotions, before they control you. Counting from 1 till 10, before acting.
Even better is retreat (take of your dress to kill an instead meditate) go to another room, and with all the wisdom inside of you,
try to understand the perspective of the other person. And when you have figured that out: Only than, give yourself permission to react.


I hope I have helped you, and wish you all the best.
I would appreciate your feedback, also when I am completely wrong...))
Thank you, Maya

Hi Maya,

I have to thank you on three counts, for the encouraging tone in your message, for the valuable content and for the time & effort you spent on writing this. Thank you so very much.

I hope I will be of some help to you as well

In my childhood, apart from certain heart breaking incidents, I was also not allowed at all to go out and interact with people. There was an active discouragement. I developed an active inner world of dreams. So I felt/still feel unable to become close to people the way I find them being attached to one another. Worse, I had to live with the reputation of being a loner. It's basically fear of rejection and a constant feeling of being the "odd one out". Not that I never realised that it's only mental and and did not take any corrective steps. But it was hard, hard work dealing with such ingrained attitudes. Basically despite my best attempts at getting friendly, I could sense that people move away from me and behave superficially, at best very formally with me.  I made a lot of mistakes on the way, trying to imitate others, trying to get very much out of the way to please others & the like. Well, they all were good learnings.  But I have been able to make some progress in recent times, at least to the extent of realizing that there is nothing that much wrong in me, and that I too belong to this world )

I got some independence after getting a job and interacting with more people than ever before. However the vivid dream world that was mine was lost sometime after I started working. I made some attempts to revive it, but it never became as strong as it used to be. I really don't want to lose it, I feel it's a great asset which will give me strength and joy while I face disasters in my real, personal life in future. So I am a loner still but when required I can act out very friendly and social. That is, for a certain amount of time.

I do intellectualize my emotions. I want to have a happy time. If I can't get it in the presence of people, I would prefer to be not with people. Not that I was always so bold, but somewhere in my heart I know I can always retreat to my dreams.

About being self opinionated, I have conflicting views myself. I feel (and I have heard others say so about me) that I am actually a person who is rather flexible, not stubborn at all. If you look at my palm my thumb especially is very flexible, it can sit almost at right angles to the palm. As you have pointed out, I have the ability to see both sides of an argument. So essentially in most situations I feel like there's nothing to argue about But my tendency to please others is so much, that my mind tells me to follow the dictates of society and decide on an opinion and fight for that The pressure of society is so much at times that, eventhough I don't feel like there's anything to argue about, I am forced to take sides and be stubborn. That's what I figured out. Whatever be the real reason, it's true that I actually get very confused often, the need to stick to my professed opinion and yet the realization that there's truth in the other argument. It can be a very debilitating experience, leading to what others may call "strange, eccentric behaviour" at times. But generally speaking, I tend to appreciate others, although I realise better than them that their own individual opinions need not be the only "right opinions". I usually hate arguing unless I am dragged into one but at times I can be very stubborn when it's also for the sake of someone close to me.

As you have commented, I do realise I have some unique strengths, and wish to improve on them constantly. And about telling me I'm a fighter when it comes to facing stress! But in my experience I feel like I'm an escapist or even a fatalist when confronted with a lot of stress.

I do have a sensitive nature. Unfortunately spent many hours in my childhood and adolescence and even now on why so-and-so behaved like this to me, did not behave this way...blah blah..there again, you see what happens when something is ingrained..it's so much difficult to prick it out the way one do with a thorn. And the joys of wallowing in self-pity..oh well better not talk about that

Thanks for your tips on getting into the occult and religion. I am of course highly into these areas. Your suggestion about starting a palmistry practice at home is a good one

There's a lot of creativity in me too, I have noticed it in my work and similar comments from my colleagues.

I am concerned most about being "at ease", it could be in my home but not necessarily so. Oftentimes I have felt an exhilaration, a sense of getting an independence long denied, while travelling. Of course travelling alone.

Thank you for all three tips. Each one is very valuable and very much applicable to me. Thanks for your time again.

Ram

Dear Aegeus,

Thank you so much for your comments. You are spot on in your analysis.

I am indeed going thru an upheaval in my life. Your statement that "I will come out of it with more stability and stronger vitality" is so much important to me. It feels good to hear from someone else what my heart wishes to believe.

I am indeed exerting myself to use more and more of my brains, to read stuff, to interact with others, to go on travels, to dull what emotions have surged in my heart due to negative experiences in my recent life.

I will work on the tips you provided about communication. However I feel a bit confused when you say that the pinky finger shows up something that could be corrected in the way I communicate, while the head line and the writers' fork would indicate an aptitude for seeing both sides of an issue and an aptitude for writing. Did you mean to say the it is the verbal side of the communication that I need to focus and correct?

After I saw your message I googled a bit on trident and neptune mount and found out that we have similar palms in these aspects. Nice to know that.

One reassuring message I find in both yours' and maya's messages is that the girdle of Venus is really positive in my hand.

Thanks again, Aegeus,
Take care..
Ram

Wow, thank you for your kind feedback and making the lines in your hand alive with your story.
That is really helpful for me, as I can get a deeper understanding and are able to fine-tune what I see.
It are all little pieces of the puzzle that I am trying to put in a whole picture. You made the picture
a little more detailed, and that's great.

Especially the childhood experiences really made sence, and again I would like to say, that I think it is
very brave of you, you put so much effort in making things for the better. Not everybody can do that.
It tells me you are a strong person, and I really respect that.

The dream-world is a very natural reaction. And I would indeed never push it away as it is a save haven for you.
It reminds me of "Project Sanctuary", from Silvia Hartmann. Look it up on the internet, I think it would help you
in making the dream-world a little more focused and purposed.

I myself, am not a public hero as well, Yet I try to tell myself, there is nothing wrong with a little eccentricity...
It makes the world a little more colourful.

Thanks again for you clear explanation...
Take care,

Maya