Hi,
I am writing these words because I am pretty much desperate and I don't know what else I can do. I am asking your help because the situation I am in causing very much pain to those who are very close and dear to me. If you're interested in helping me, please continue reading.
The story is a bit long, I tried to make it as short as I could.
It all started about nine years ago, when my mother's ex-good friend (let's call her L.) saw a young woman crying. L. asked her why was she crying, and the woman replied that her boyfriend kicked her out of his house and she has nowhere to go.
L. felt sorry for her and offered the woman to live in her house. Instead of paying rent she would clean L.'s house.
It turned out that she didn't only clean the house but also got into L's son bed. L. didn't like the idea that a woman in her 20's is having sex on daily basis with her teenage son and tried to get rid of her by setting her up with someone.
L. knew that my brother was still single, so she nagged him to come to her house and meet a "wonderful young woman". After a while my brother agreed to meet her and he and the young woman (let's call her B.) started dating. At that time we, his family, did not know why L. was playing matchmaker, we found out about it only a few years later.
After awhile my brother told us that B. was pregnant and that they are going to get married. We are not an interfering and nosey family, my brother was already in his late 30's, we thought that he is old and mature enough to make his own decisions, so we told him to do what he thought was right (even if we did not approve of it).
Eight months afterwards B. gave birth to a baby daughter. The child has no similarity to my brother, and even back then, when she was just born my mother had a feeling that my brother was not the baby's father. It is most likely that she's right. Even though B. had sexual relations with L.'s son at that time, I am saying most likely because my brother refuses to perform a DNA test.
My brother was always very close to my mother, he always respected her and tried to be there for his family whenever it was needed. From the moment he met B., he started to turn his back to his family.
From the first day in which B. met us, she was constantly telling horrible things to us (yes, without any shame, right in our faces) and spreading nasty fraudulent gossip about us.
My mother has been called "old stupid bitch", "old whore", "crazy old bitch"- and this is just to name a few. She told my late aunt the she was an "old dirty woman" and I, among other things, am a "mental retarded" and a "whore".
I can tell you that my mother is one of the smartest people I know and much respected person in the town we live. My late aunt was always super clean , her house was as clean as a pharmacy. About myself, I can tell you that currently I'm studding for my P.H.D. About the whore, I will let you be the judge if I sound like one or not.
If this is said to us personally, you can imagine what was told about us behind our backs.
By the way, a few years ago we found out the B.'s ex-boyfriend kicked her out of his house because she said things to his family and about them. But my brother, not only that he did not kick her out, he has ALWAYS defended and still is defending her no matter what she does.
And this is only the tip of the iceberg, only a small part of B.'s behavior and actions.
My brother has a very successful business, he makes very good money (my mother gave him the money to start this business). B. is not working, she sits at home all day with nothing to do. My brother gave her free access to his bank account and her own credit cards. He's working from the early morning until late in the evening and he doesn't control her spending, so she spends.
Behind his back, she gives money to her parents (who bought a new house, new furniture and a new car during a very short period- something quite unusual for people who don't work) and also to L. and her son.
She is still having sex with L.'s son during all this time she is with my brother, she paid for his college education, has been paying his rent for more than six years, paying his bills (since he's not working) and much more.
Those are the less disturbing details, in my opinion, after all that's his business what is she doing with the money and whom she sleeps with.
What disturbs me most is the influence that B's behavior has on my brother and my family.
She's turning her daughter against us and teaching her to be very disrespectful towards her alleged father and us. When she was younger she didn't call him Dad of father, she called him only by his first name. When she grow older she began to call him Dad, but when ever he does something that doesn't satisfy her or tells her to do something she doesn't want to do, she tells him things like: "shut up, you're a nobody here", "this is my house and I will throw you out" etc.
She has never called my mother Grandma, only by her first name (B.'s parents were always called grandma and grandpa).
When she got older, she also added to that "stupid old woman", "bitch" and "I hate you, I hope you will die".
I was called "whore" many times, she told me that I was her most hated thing in the world, and quite a few times I received "warm wishes" to die soon.
Those are clearly things that a 6 or 7 years old can’t say without someone telling her to say so.
When we tell her that she shouldn't say such things, she says something rude. If her mother is not present, she threatens that she will tell her mother that we were mean to her, yelled at her or even bit her- knowing that her mother will tell my brother. And he, as usual, will believe her and take her side, because children do not lie (well, unless they are taught to do so).
When my aunt was dying, her last wish was to see my brother and B. prevented him from seeing my late aunt.
B. is never satisfied with what she has, something or someone always bothers her, she is constantly arguing with my brother and he does everything she wants just to keep her calm and silent. The whole situation has a very negative effect on everyone.
My brother aged very much, he looks much older than his actual age. He became both very bad tempered and apathetic at the same time. He started to have serious health problem, he had two heart attacks by the age of 45.
It is also very painful for my mother, to see her son in that shape and gating this kind of disrespectful attitude from him.
Since my brother met B. the relations between him and us has been bad, sometime they were "correct" and sometime he didn't speak with us for month.
We tried to convince him that his relationship with B. is destroying both him, told him about all the things we have found out about B. (some of which I have wrote here), cried, begged , and then cried and begged some more, but nothing helped. It is as if my brother was brain washed by her.
If she doesn't want my brother to have any contact with his family, he does what she wants and cuts off all his contacts with us.
It came to a severe peak point, when my brother had told me and my mother "I hate you so much bitches, I don't want to see you ever again, I am sick and tired of you both and you both can go to hell". He hasn't spoke with us since then.
Each and every day, I see how this separation from my brother breaks my mother's heart, one third of her family, the son she loves so much, treats her in such a cruel and horrible way.
It is seem irrational, my brother has totally changed his
personality after he met B. It just doesn't make sense, people in their late 30's- 40's don't go though such 180 degree changes all of the sudden.
And just because we tried to speak to my brother's rational/ logical side and nothing helped, it makes me think that there's something more to it, more that can be seen.
B. and her family are from a country where there are many gypsies, their poverty there makes them, many times, give away secret knowledge for money. I'm starting to assume that there are some magic and/ or spells involved here.
I don't have much knowledge in that area, but I know about it because I have always been interested in what is considered, by the science, to be unseen and unknown.
However, until the last few months I didn't absorb that B. might use it.
More than that, friends of our family also say that it is just doesn't make sense to them. When I told them about my assumption I was sure that they would say something like "it's nonsense" or "you're crazy", but to my surprise they said "it's possible" or "maybe you're right".
If anyone thinks that there is something in what I am saying here, and if anyone can somehow help me, I will be forever grateful.
Thank you very much for reading it all (I know it was extremely long…), sorry for any grammar/ spelling mistakes, I am from a country where English is not the main spoken language.
Take care, D.
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