Hello.
If your first girlfriend or boyfriend you ever had took there own life on Christmas Eve while your working a little overtime You have about 5 minutes to go when you get the news. You were going to actually propose to her after work 23 years have gone by. You still have vivid nightmares every nite You can stop thinking about her or him and your living a sad gloomy life with all your feelings gone except for sadness and pain.
Every Halloween since then you feel her presence around you no matter where you are Is it possible that the person was somehow connected with the supernatural, Spirit form or some kind of accult that could leave you with a curse for life

{{{{{{{Gizmo}}}}}}} 23 years is a very very long time. I am so sorry that you are still feeling like this, but I am not surprised. When faced with losing a loved one, especially in such a traumatic way, it can leave many emotions that need to be worked through. You sound like you need to get help in person, someone to talk this through so that your feelings can be discussed and understood. Every time a person takes their own life like this is tragic and I am sure you have lots of unanswered things, perhaps you might benefit from seeing if one of our psychics could make contact and help from that angle?  I don't think its a 'curse' or bad spell that has been put on you, but the emotional turmoil you are left in is definately a curse all the same, you have to get help and try and rebuild your life. The first step was writing that post here, I hope that has helped in some small way xxxx

I would agree with Gem and say that its more to do with your unresolved grief than the paranormal.
You are having whats known as an abnormal grief reaction and your stuck within the 6 stages of grieving process.  You need to see a bereavment counsellor and complete your process and move on from your pain (sad and gloomy life)  If you are still feeling a presence after all of this process and once you are no longer sad and gloomy then I would suggest that you see a spiritualist or medium.

My intuition tells me you blame yourself for not seeing this happen and your thoughts about this have become unravelled over time.  Please do as i ask and see the counsellor, or a mental health nurse.

Regards

Suzi

Have to agree with Gem and Suzi.  They are both people whose wisdom and compassion I respect very much and if they both recommend seeking assistance, then I would take their advice, no questions asked.

Thank you to all that replied to my post
And I will take all the advice and contact a therapist or counseler.
Thank you again.