Greeting from an ex-metal head!
I used to listen to all kinds of metal, even doom, gothic and black.
Started when I was 12.
Now I'm more moderate and I'm back to my roots so I listen to old Metallica, Slayer, Paradise lost, Tiamat...
I also enjoy In flames, Samael, SOAD, Katatonia, Killswitch engage, 6 feet under and many others I can't remember now.
I now find some extreme black metal bands to be completely silly ...like Cradle of filth or Impaled nazarene....Impaled nazarene is now something I absolutely CAN'T listen to.
But I still enjoy Immortal from time to time..:-P
Metal music can be smart, it can be liberating, but some people tend to exaggerate...like in everything else...music shouldn't be a destructive force no matter how negative the lyrics or the sound may seem to be.