I may open up a can of worms with this post but I think that occasionally it is good to stir things up.  
Now the first let me make it very clear that my intention is not to disturb anybody or to provoke any kind of angry or negative reaction.
Quite the contrary!
All I am interested in is attempting to better understand this phenomenon myself.  And possibly... make you think more deeply on what is mediumship.

In my experience with mediums, a lot of the medium can do can be simply explained by clever series of questions and answers.  Only once in my entire life have I ever been to medium that has told me something about myself and only I know.
In my first experience, the person asked me questions like "have you ever lost an uncle" and "was he a big man".  In my opinion these questions aren't demonstrating anykind of psychic skill but are in truth "fishing questions" and even though they may be true, they are what I would call information gathering questions..

In my second experience the woman took my cell phone in her hands and proceeded to tell me everything about my childhood including some very personal and negative things that have happened to me. She didn't ask me a single question.

All I'm trying to point out here is that some mediums are nothing more than highly trained and highly perceptive charlatans.  Where other mediums are definitely in touch with something otherworldly..

How is a person to know the difference?
(I believe that I have already answered my own question but I'm looking for to seeing what you think on this subject)

My own (possibly judgemental and definitely controversial) opinion on this is that people who have the gift of or ability to communicate with spirits have no business gaining financially from it, and that those who do, for the most part, should be dealt with carefully.  (I know that others see it differently, but in my own case I do consider it a gift that comes from outside of myself and therefore doesn't "belong" to me.  Therefore, it would seem wrong to me to "re-gift", as they say--to profit in some way from what was given out of love.)

Spirits don't come around to entertain, or do parlor tricks, or predict a person's future (a spirit once said to me, "You don't just drop by if you're a spirit").  When they reach out to the living, it's for a serious purpose--either guidance, or because they want to pass on a message to someone.  I don't believe that they're likely to just "pop up" at the behest of a medium in his or her place of "business", or onstage or on TV.  My guess is that they would find such antics laughable.

I believe (based on my own experience, which I may or may not interpret correctly) that spirits will find  ways to communicate with those they want to communicate with regardless of whether or not there's a "medium" around--perhaps not in so many words, but in other ways.  I have, very rarely, passed on messages, but they were very personal and usually directed to people I know--free of charge, of course.

So I guess I'm just saying that, although certainly not everyone who uses his or her gift or ability as a business or means of attaining notoriety is a fraud (I'm sure that there are those who are perfectly sincere as well), it's important to consider someone's motives in claiming that they can pass messages from the spirit world on to you.

Doe

Hmmmm, thinking...question is shorting out my brain.  

All play aside.  I cannot speak for all, only me.  When I am moved to relay a message for someone, which rarely happens on the personal level, I do it freely.  Just like certain gifts of mine.  

The question would be how do we make money being mediums?  My heart tells me that I should just apply it to my everyday life. Whatever field of employment I am guided to.  Use it as an asset, see it as a deeper insight kinda thing.  If I were to get more info for someone that a spirit may wish to convey I would still do it free of charge.  

Mediums are real.  While there are those who are bogus.  Myself I am not allowed to charge for the messages relayed. Having being told that if I do I will loose what was given to me.  Maybe there are other rules for other mediums, I dunno.  My Guides, and Guardian will not let me charge for certain things.  They say this is a big no-no.   In this I am still learning, so I am not sure what they are talking about.  They just said for me not to do it, and I listen.  I test them, being a skeptic, but in this I feel a deeper humming of truth.  For me I know I am not allowed to profit by the messages for others. Now the messages for me, that is something else.  They help me in ways to where I do make money.  I am provided for, I want for nothing.  Nothing more, nothing less. Again hard to put into words how this works in my life.  Not sure about others, wonder if they have the same guidlines they follow.

How do you know the differance between a real or a fake?  

I have a question reguarding the woman who told you about your life while holding your cell phone...how do you not know that she was not a telepath?  When they start talking about my memories, perhaps some that I forgotten, I wonder if they are not just flipping through my memory book in my mind. Interesting.  So really what is the differance between a medium and one who reads people?  ( Reading...Be it by their thoughts, pictures, feelings, energy signatures, etc.)  I thought that mediums worked with spirits.  Being that wire between point A to point B. Could be wrong, wouldn't be the first time.  

Safe Journey

In answer to that last bit...yup!

(Ditto for the part where you say, "I am provided for, I want for nothing.  Nothing more, nothing less."  It sometimes seems to trouble others that I'm content with what I have, but I am--kinda hard to explain sometimes, though! )

Doe

To charge or not to charge is as personal as each medium.  And to judge one way or the other as expressed here for others is not to be considered as it is judgement.  

Mediumship is NOT a gift - a gift is given with no effort on the part of the receiver.  A talent, skill, ability is a part of the human complex and the good medium will train, educate and unfold their talents to their best possible level.  That is the measure of a good medium.  Does the medium just get it by osmosis or have they truly educated themselves?  This would be a better barometer than the money.  Although if the situation is such that there is money on the table and expectations of performance, then the money becomes an issue.

I charge for my services as it takes time, effort and educated skills to accomplish good mediumship.  And I do consider mine good mediumship.  To charge or not is not the criteria of a good medium.  Overcharging is another story.

If you have spirit helpers and are not to pass messages, why would they be there to aid your journey?  There are teachers in spirit who bring some wonderful inspiration - I am sure you would not consider it too monetary to charge for a book form of your inspirations?  There are many purposes for spirit communication.  They often have an agenda to pass their message through the medium and you may find yourself involved in things quite surprising that you had not considered your own journey.  This is only in the sense of working with the spirit guide - not being taken over by them for their own purposes.

The mandate of good mediumship is service.  Giving to others is certainly a high priority and anyone who charges for mediumship is often giving more than they receive for their service.  Believe me, my guides have not left because of charging.  Although to be honest I don't take the money for me but to keep my church and learning centre functioning.

Psychometry (the holding of an object - in this case your cell phone) is a well known talent connected to the psychic.  There is a lot to be gleaned through an experienced psychometrist.  

Mediumship is not about personal messages per se - it is about proof of life after death through the description of your passed loved ones.  Message will come because they have an interest in the living - love never dies.  And when the message comes from spirit sources, it tends to be more about the spiritual journey, than the material journey.  You can judge that from any good medium.