Q     Do you just ask, or just talk to Him?

A     Mechanical words are not necessary. Prayer should come from the heart, and the heart speaks without language, without words. No set prayers move Him, but the prayer from the heart moves Him. We should be in tune with the Lord, with our heart; that is the right prayer -- to be always in constant communion with Him. So, real prayer is always from the heart, from within. Set prayers are all right. I am not against them. They also give us certain strength. our will power becomes so strong that we face ourkarmas quite boldly and gracefully. But that type of prayer does not take us back to Him. The real prayer is meditation, the spiritual practice, which alone enables us to contact the Shabd, the Sound Current, and that will take us back to Him.

Meditation is nothing but prayer for His guidance, for His grace. That is the only purpose of meditation. we hardly devote any of our time in meditation, but devote all our time in asking for fulfillment of our desires. If we are dutifully loyal in our meditationj, we are actually praying to Him. He is not unmindful of what we need, but He will not give us anything that is not good for us. Perhaps when we are not getting what we want. He has some greater blessing for us in that He may want us to detach ourselves from the world. He wants to take us back to Him. We think that He is not hearing our prayers when actually He is hearing our prayers. But He will not give us a hot burning coal to burn our hands, just because we ask for it. He is hearing our prayer, but we do not know whether what we are asking for is right or wrong. He alone knows it. Sometimes we think we are not being heard and that the Lord does not help us. That is a wrong notion. We do not know what is best for us. Just leave it to Him. That is the right prayer.

Q     We should not place our desires or our wishes before God, but should cheerfully accept whatever comes, with confidence that whatever He does. He is doing for our own good. Is that correct? Will you please elaborate?

A      Yes, that is right. We have to adjust ourselves. We should not try to adjust the Lord to our wishes. Mind creates the desires and we are knocking at the Lord's door, asking Him to fulfill them. We are actually slaves of themind, not slaves of the Lord. We have to become the devotees of teh Lord and not of the mind. We have to tell ourmind to remain in the Will of the Lord, and not ask the Lord to remain in the will of themind. So, our real prayer is the longing and desire to merge back into Him, and to accomplish that we ask for His grace, His love and devotion, and when we get that, nothing else is left to be desired.

If you bring a millionaire to your house, the money automatically comes with him. But we are only desiring the possessions of the Lord and not the Lord at all. We generally attach ourselves to what He gives and not to the Giver at all. We forget the Giver and enjoy only His gifts, but if we realize the Giver within us, we automatically get everything. He is the owner of everything. He knows what we need. But we are only to ask for Him. That is the real prayer.

Q     What about praying for other people?

A     If we do not know what is good for us, how can we know what is good for others? Whether you alter anything or not by praying, it is difficult to say, but you do get inner strength by praying to the Lord. We pray for others when we  are concerned about them because they are ill or poor, or want their wishes fulfilled. This is due to our attachment with those people, and it is the mind which creates all these desires to be fulfilled, and when we pray for others, we may even be asking for something which is not good for them. For example, if a child is ill and wants some sweets,  though he weeps and begs, his mother will not give them to him. She loves the child and knows that sweets are not good for him when he has a fever, and she may have to give him a bitter pill instead. But the child cries for the sweets because he does not know what  is good to him. He wants sweets, but the mother does not give them to him because she loves him and knows that they are not good for him. On the other hand, if she concedes to his request and gives him sweets, I think she really does not love him at all. His fever may go higher and his illness smay even become worse because of the sweets which he begged for and received.

Similarly, the Lord or the Master will give us only what is best for us and for those for whom we are praying. He does not want us to be attached to the world. He wants to detach us from the world. He will not give us those things which will  make us forget the Lord and take us back to the senses, and not again make us slaves of karmas. He will give us only those things which detach us from the world and take us nearer to the Lord. We do not know what is good for us or for others, but He knows what is good for everyone. So, why not leave everything to Him, and just do our duty? Real prayer is not by the lips, not by set words. It comes from the heart, and the heart does n ot need any language any words, in order to pray. The real prayer is just submission, surrender to Him.

Q       I know for myself, but I mean for others. I take care of a lot of people who are sick, old people and it is for them.

A        There is no harm in praying. Whether you will be able to help them practically or not by doing so, you are at least helping yourself by praying. It will strengthen your will power to face all that.

Q        When a body is dead, if we say some prayers so that the soul may hear it, and to help the soul, does it?

A        No, the soul does not hear our prayer. These prayers are said for the benefit of the bereaved ones. All that we do is to console those people whose relatives or friends have left them. We can do practically nothing for the departed soul. It has to anser for its own karma. All the ceremonies, prayers and things that we do after anybody dies is, in fact, to console the survivors and ourselves, and not that departed soul. We do not help the dead at all. His or her karma will take care of that. Generally when we pray for the dead. I think we are really praying for ourselves to be able to bear our loss and separation. We do not help the departed at all.

Q        Your Holiness would the suitable devotional approach that we have in the West, a simple prayer, be sufficient for us to attain the goal, rather than the more complicated Sahaj Yoga rules, which I personally find rather difficult?

A        No doubt this is a very difficult subject to understand. The main thing is what is prayer? Actually, our whole meditation is nothing but a prayer before the Lord, nothing but a prayer from the heart, the soul, to merge back into the Lord. Real prayer is only to pray to the Lord to have mercy on us, to give us. His grace and guidance to live in His Will, to give us such circumstances that we can meditate on His Name. That is real prayer. Prayer does not mean that we shoul pray for worldly things, or that we shoul pray for the fulfillment of a desire. That is not the process for getting back to the Lord at all, but is, in fact, just sowing seeds which make us come back into the world again to reap the results of those prayers. The real prayer is from the heart. It's submission to the Lord. He is not unmindful of what we need. If we are dutiful in our meditation, He who knows what is best for us will definitely give us what we need, whether we ask Him or not.


Q       Can you talk to us about the unconditional surrender to the Master?

A       First, what is surrender? Surrender is when we take our ego and 'I-ness' out of us. As long as the mind dominates the soul, there can be no surrender. When the soul dominates the mind, then you can say that we are in a position to surrender to anybody. We feel that we have surrendered, even in physical love, when we submerge our will into the will of the other person. We try to merge our happiness into the happiness of the other person. We always try to do what pleases the othe rperson, and never try to assert ourself or to adjust the other person to us. We always adjust ourself to the other person's will.  That is what we always like to do in love even in this world. We always try to cooperate and to submit ourself to the other person. Spiritual love is the same. We have to surrender ourself to the Master. It means that we have to take our ego out of us and blend our whole heart with his heart. He is already merged into the Lord and by merging ourself into him we are automatically merged into the Lord. That can be done only by meditation. The more we meditate, the more we are driving our ego. By doing so, we will be drawn towards the Master, and we are automatically surrendering to him, and through him, we are surrendering to the Lord himself. So, we can surrender unconditionally only when we go inside, seee the radiant form of the Master, merge ourself in him and then go ahead. That is the real unconditional surrender. But we have to work for that while living in this world. To attaint that real surrender, which we call Sharan, we have to remain within the dictates and principles that were told to us at the time of initiation. We have to put forth our honest efforts to remain on the path, to give time to meditation. That, in a way, is surrender to the Master, and this surrender will lead to the internal surrender, the real or unconditional surrender. That will be when we see the Master inside, forget ourself and merge in his will, in his love. WE will feel that we the Master there --- "we" do not exist.

Q      In Siritual Gems, in the letters, one  Master tells his disciple to say, " I am nothing " , How can this be interjected into meditation? Is it a process of thinking? Is it to be used consciously? What is the idea behind that?

A      You will get the feeling that you are nothing, when you merge in the love of the Master. You are not mentally nor symbolically to feel that you are nothing, or, "I am nothing," nor to feel that you are everything. You will just forget what you are. When you absolutely blend yourself into the love of another person, then you forget what you are. Then you know that you are nothing. Everything is 'he' or 'she'. Similarly, we have to forget by meditation that we are anything and know that everything is the Master. That will only be, as I have just explained, when we drive  our ego out of us by meditation.

Q      May the Master serve as the medium? For instance, I would like to dedicate all my actions to the Lord but that is nebulous. I cannot speak to the Lord. May one take it through the Master?

A       That is the whole essence of the teachings. The fact is that we do not know the Lord and we have not seen the Lord, and so far as we are concerned, we work through the Master, towards that end. That is the gist of the whole discourse you have just heard.

Q      Does this imply, then, that we should turn our backs?

A      Do whatever you can under the circumstances. You can avoid the situation and you can be indifferent to their attitude. I mean, do whatever is practical. One should always take a practical, objective view of the circumstances.

Q     Well, we have noticed that the people who handled them best, are those, who have aggressed right back at them. But is that the best way of doing it.?

A     That is not the right way. For example, I will tell you about an actual experience of the Great Master:  When he started preaching Sant Mat openly, when he started extensive tours in the country, he had a lot of opposition, especially from bigoted religious people. Perhaps tey thought that he was misinterpreting that holy book, the Granth Sahib, and trying to spoil and corrupt the masses. Of course, his teachings were pure spirituality and devoid of commercialism, they appealed to the seekers of Truth, and he attracted large crowds. Those opposing the Great Master became very nervous, thinking that their membership might dwindle, and perhaps it might affect their income also. In those early days they opposed him in devious ways, even attempting physical violence, as you have read in With a Great Master in India, by Dr. Johnson. In India, we usually hold satsang in the open, because no hall can accommodate us. We have gatherings of ten thousand to twenty thousand, and sometimes over two hundred thousand.

So, wherever the Great Master went to hold satsang, those opposing him set up their own camp next to it, and put up their own loudspeakers so that whatever the Great Master said should not be heard by the seekers. When the Great Master had a program to go anywhere, they would be there the day before, parading and announding with the bat of drums to the whole public that he was coming to corrupt the people and they should not attend the satsang. The result was that more and more people came to hear him and more and more began to follow him, so much so, that the people who opposed him attended out of curiosity and ended up by becoming his most devoted followers. I know many who are living in the Dera now, who in the beginning opposed him tooth and nail on the religious platform until they realized what he was really teaching. They are very sincere and devoted satsangis and some of them are writing books for us now.

Throughout all that, the Great Master never changed his attitude. He never argued with anybody. He simply said, "I am just doing my duty. If the teachings appeal to you, you are most welcome. If they do not appeal to you, I cannot help it. I have to do my duty." He treated everyone with love and kindness, and now the very people who opposed him take pride in being the followers of such a Great Master. At first, they had thought that they would attend his satsngs just to expose the Greate Master, as well as out of curioisity. But in the end they were convinced of the greatness and the truth of his teachings.



When you are strong in your convictions and you have no malice or hatred against anybody, you do you duty and let others do what they like, they will change nad you will remain strong within yourself. At least, you are happy with yourself. You do not make yourself miserable by hating them. So, we have to make the best use of a situation, without having any malice against anybody.

Q     My family are all so much against my talking about Sant Mat or even bringing up the subject, and I just do not dare to talk to anyone about it.

A      There is really no need to talk to anyone.

Q      Yet I wonder wQhat to do about it. I have an adopted son almost thirty years now, and I know so many things are all wrong. What can one do about it? Can I tell Him? I do not dare to talk to him much because it disturbs him, and the answers that I get leave me disturbed. What can I do about a case like that? I cannot ignore it entirely?

A      You can just try to help and explain with love, and do not feel much concerned or worried about it. There is no other alternative. You cannot ignore it entirely, but with affection and love you can try to help him understand. Then, if he does not want it, you should not worry about it. You have done your duty. We should not unnecessarily raise unpleasant issues. In a family we have to overlook many things in order to live together harmoniously.

Q      I have got to know whether one should meet a problem head-on, or whether one knows inside what is right or not?

A      We should not feel disturbed inside. We should not lose our balance. We know these things do happen, and everybody has to pay for his own karma. People are just dancing to the tune of their mind, so we have to adjust. If we try to solve the problems of the world we can never succeed. We can only rise above these problems. If we succeed, but if we have strong shoes on our feet, these pricks do not bother us. We should rise above these things by means of our spiritual practice, and not feel much disturbed about them.

Q       For the past year and a half I have attended satsang almost regularly, and my wife has offered very little resistance. She is coming here this afternoon for the first time, and the lack of resistance from her is an indication that deep down there is an aceptance that has not come out yet?

A       I do not know about that, but it is very clear that this is an indication of her affection and love for you. I do not know whether this is an indication that she is being prepared to understand or to see, but it definitely indicates that she has affection and respect for your principles. She wants to please you. You should take it only in that light, and then leave the rest of it to her own fate, her own karma.

We should never try to force the teachings on anybody else. We can help anybody who is interested. But if a person is not interested, we can help him much more by trying to live the life ourselves and not force our views on him. At least in this country there is so much independence of viewpoints, so much individuality. Everybody has his own background and he has to stand on his own convictions, on his own principles. And everyone has his own time, so we should never feel frustrated if our partner is not interested in Sant Mat, as long as the partner is not an obstacle in our way.

If we are really fond of each other, we will also respect each other's individual convictions, each other's individual views on life, and especially regarding spirituality. So, we should be happy and grateful if the other partner in any way is not an obstacle in our path. Of course, we are always happy if both, husband and wife, can come on the path. They can be of great help and strength to each other. But the alternative is, if one does not become a block in your way, you should appreciate that too.

Q   Master, are we to help our relatives if they need help? Fro instance, a mother who has young babies, would that be considered as an attachment when we render service to them?

A    No, sister, Non-attachment does not mean that we are not to render service to our relations at all. We have certain responsibilities towards our parents, our other relations and friends, We must carry out these responsibilities, otherwise we are not the right type ourselves. I must say, we should dalways do our best to help especially older people who need our help, who need our respect, who need our strength to pull through that age and that time. To help them is something quite different from merely feeling perturbed the whole day and worrying about them and yet not doing anything for them. That is no use. We should help them practically and yet not be worried about them. We must do our duty by giving them respect and help. We owe them certain obligations that we must pay, otherwise we would ot be able to live with ourselves. Our conscience would bother us if we did not do our duty, and we could have no peace of mind.

A mother a father to do so much for their children, to help them, to give them a good start in life, guide them. They sacrifice so many things for their children, and children also have responsibilities to their parents and benefactors in their old age. We must do our duty. They did theirs, and when we become paretns and do so much for our own children, then we realize how much our parents did for us. We are greatly indebted to them. We feel frustrated when our children are not attentive to us, and we say that we have done so much for them, but they do not care for us. At the same time we forget what we are doing to our parents, we can expect the same from our own children.

Q     I have a niece with babies. As an aunt, should I help if she needs help?

A     These are just individual things and you can make up your mind about what she needs and what you can do, but I am discussing these things in general. We should be helpful to each other. Only a human can be helpful to a human. Animals cannot come to our help, so we must give a helping hand to each other wherever we can.

Q      If one were put in a position where one had to choose between duty to one's father and duty and help to one's daughter, which has precedence?

A      You want to know whether you have more allegience to your father or to your daughter. Well, you have to help both. You have a certain responsiblity towards your daughter. You have to deal with both of them, and only you can decide how far you can ignore your daughter and how far you cannot ignore your father, and how far you cannot ignore yourself in dealing with the situation. I think the answer must come from your.

Q      And one' spersonal problems, like family and people that leave one disturbed, should one try to go and leave them as they are, or stay and meet the situation and overcome the problems?

A      We have to live in this world, realizing and taking care of our responsibilities and duties towareds other people, but not feel much concerned about them. We should attend to al these things just as a matter of duty. We should be a better citizen, a better husband or wife, a better son or daughter, by doing our duties, but should not worry about public opinion, but just do our duty.