Hello everyone...not sure how to start this out but for a while now I've been feeling as if I've made a mistake choosing the person I got married to. Its been 9 years (together for 11) and it just feels wrong...its been stressful that last couple years with work and family life ... (both of us). Sometimes I feel as if we're 2 different people who should have never gotten together; He never values my opinion. I've been told that what I have to say doesn't matter and it never will; I often wonder if other people have those issues as I don't have any close friends or family that I can confide in. He suffers from depression and blames me for it. He didnt have an easy childhood (neither did I) his mother is verbally & emotional abusive & manipulative; his father was abusive towards his mother (my situation was similar...I had a narcissitic father and a mother who chose to turn a blind eye to his behaviour...) I know I have my faults and short comings but Im just so fed up and tired of contantly getting blamed for all his problems...Will it get better?

It always gets better, just keep the hope alive! Hugs!

if i can express my view

1st step .. explain him , how u r feeling  ( may be he dont know consciously , how u r feeling abt his deeds or may be he shud hear it from u to transform )

2nd step .. dont expect him to change ( he will change one day ,, be it a week , a year or a decade ) , if u r pure from ur side and with patience and endurance ( No complaints , no demands , just concentrate on whether u r doing things correctly or not - if  yes continue , if not try to be as correct as possible )

3rd step .. try to endure as far as u can ... and beyond that point , if u honestly feel that there is nothing more u can do , end the relation for both of ur good


I feel Love is the greatest weapon , mankind has ever developed .. have it in ur heart , in most probability people and things around u change likewise .


wish things get better soon for u .

Hi Cardk,
Just signed on and saw your message.So I hope this isn't too late.
First,everything goes in cycles,if you're down now,then the time to
rise will be upon you soon(see tarot card#10,The Wheel).Having been
through darker times I know it isn't easy,but watch for a light.It
will appear.
I'd be happy to look at his and your birthchart and share some
thought with you on the situation.Very best wishes.
                                                     Fare-well,Steve

My advice is if you did try all that you can to improve the relationship but it doesn't work, then it's really time to let go.  Letting go is really a very hard thing to do.