I am in need of a hug. My ex is wanting to try and work things out. We are friends now and I am seeing someone new, but my ex and I have children together.  I don't know what to do. Part of me wants to stay where I am and part of me really misses being with my family. I have the children, but it seems to be missing their dad. The guy I am seeing now is great, but we are having small issues. Just confused I think.

Big Hugs that you find clarity in this difficult time of choices.

*big huggles* listen to your heart, what does that seem to tell you?

Hi,

I have a divorce coming up, and my son will be living with me, so I think I can relate a LITTLE to your feelings.

My first thought on reading your post was, "Why did the relationship end in the first place?'  Sometimes it's easier to forget the reasons that things didn't work out in favor of nostalgia and--for lack of a better word--convenience.  For years I went through this unending cycle of having my husband treat me really badly, and being miserable, and then conveniently "forgetting" how bad things were when he was nicer, because the prospect of divorce, and trying to break that to our son, was just scarier than keeping the status quo.  But I've finally reached the point where I know that I need to MAKE myself remember what he's capable of, because, as difficult and uncomfortable and sad as the process of divorce will be for all of us, the "status quo" going on endlessly will be much more destructive.

Of course, that's just MY story...again, I wonder why your relationship with your ex ended in the first place.  Was it something that can be worked on and improved with time if you both were to really try, or would you just end up in the same boat again a few months after getting together?

In any case, I wish you all the best with it all, and feel free to write again!

Doe

Can you look at the pros and cons 5 years from now?

If you take a road that hasn't been cleared of the same old rocks, it's going to be a bumpy ride,
If you take that time to recalculate, reassess, are you able to forgive and forget? Can you move through your life
with knowing the past with this man and still be happy?

Let some time pass, a few months before taking it on again.