so heres the sitution my friend got evicted from his apartment a few days ago which sucks and i feel for him but the problem is that hes forever relying on me and my roomate to help him out, which means he doesnt even hardly try to find an apartment before he asks us if he could move in with us! So i was talking to him last night and i already told him it was a no because me and roomate barely survive on a weeks groceries as it is with a 3rd person it would be more of a pain in th ass, and as i told him no he started giving me these guilt trips about things that were gonna happen once the landlord throws him out, and then the kicker was that he actually said "you only care about yourself and not your friends!!!" pffft!!  i cant tell ya how much that pissed me off because i love all my friends, my family, and my bf more then i love myself and i would do anything for them, never EVER imply that i dont care about my friends! Basically after he said that then it was really a no because i dont like being guilt tripped into doing anything! never have never will! I will refuse to do anything if i'm guilt tripped into it, i also have my reasons why i dont want him living with us:

1. He's overly opionated about everything!!! he has to be right constantly
2. Food would be even more scarce in the house then it already is
3. privacy and alone time would be gone
4. Theres no room for him, theres only a room for myself and my roomate where the hell would he sleep? He even said he would sleep on the floor....i dont think so!!
5.  I know how it works. You get evicted and say your gonna stay for only a couple of months until you get cozy and then you never leave. no way!!
6. As above i said i would do anything for my friends....the only time i would ever let them live with me is if it was a life or death situation such as someone wanting to harm or kill them, i wouldnt say no to that


but yeah thats the situation. would any of you do something if someone tried to guilt trip you into doing?

People seem to guilt trip me all the time...Im like the push over and i always give in,most times....Well there was these two times i said a flat out no and they got upset etc...They seem to forget i have a child to think about now too and he comes before anyone...In time they will get over it and in time im sure your friend will too.........I think people who guilt trip are selfish....To use the power of words to get what they want and use another person like that......I had a friend stay with me and i went insane...What started out as a "just till i find a place" lated nearly 6months and she wasnt the best person to live with....I think you are doing the right thing....If you feel it will make things worse for you and your roomate then keep with the no....Yes life is about helping others also but number one is always yourself and i dont think you should cramp your living for him.....Maybe he should get cracking and start looking for a place....*huggles* and my love to you.


Tamara :o)

yeah thats why i wont give in if someone tries to guilt trip me into anything, its all about control in your words and being selfish about it so you can get your own way, i've given into things like that when i was younger and it always led me into trouble so i refuse to do it now, my roomate used to live somewhere else and he had someone who said they were gonna stay for a few weeks because they had nowhere to go, hes one of my friends too and hes a really nice guy but that few weeks ended up being a year and a half and my roomate got into trouble for it

Yeah sometimes helping others isnt always the best thing...Because i think if you said to him..Sure move in untill you find a place and then that lasted a loooooong time it would feel worse then to kick him out...But then you might not be able to get him to leave....Which then will ruin the friendship....I still get talked into doing things i dont want,which i guess its my fault,but words are powerful also and people should just accept no...I get told no and i dont throw a tantrum.....Perhaps if you have some spare time which is rare these days.....Get a local paper or something and show him a few places in there....At least then he cant say you didnt lend a hand...And be honest if he continues to make you feel bad....Tell him its not a good idea,i have a roomate to think about too and it will ruin the friendship we have,or just tell him you will annoy the shit out of me and i cant put up with you living with me lol....

lmao!! well the time he did tell me he was getting evicted i tried to help him find a place on the internet(which is not a good idea considering most places wont advertise on the internet) when i couldnt find anything he said he would go find a newspaper and find a place, a couple of days after that hes suggesting to move in with us :/ ok yeah thats hardly trying. i know he can do it, he just chooses not to try