Hi everyone,
Im having a small crisis, could really use some advice.
Eight years ago when I was eighteen, I had a relationship with a married man that resulted in a pregnancy. I didnt tell him about her for almost three years. 1. because he has a family (wife, and three boys) and I didnt want to be the homewrecker. 2. he's a millionair and Im afraid of him taking custody. 3. he plays a proffessional sport, and if it got out that he had an affair and a secret child, it would be a huge scandal in the news.
I told him 4 years ago and he immediately started paying child support. He said he was grateful that I didnt go to court with it, he wouldnt have a family if his wife found out. He's very adiment on keeping our daughter a secret. He has only seen her 3 times, but he's been paying support. I have been intimate with him 3 times in last 3 months. I know its wrong but I have a soft spot for him.
Well, a couple days ago, he asked if I would be against a paternity test. I said no, not at all. After I started thinking about it, Im certain this would be opening a can of worms, and its something that I cant take back. Im sure he is her father, thats not the issue. Im afraid that once he gets proof, he'll try to get custody. My feeling is that secrets always have a way of coming out and once it does, he wont have any reason not to try to get custody. His family will always look at her as the child of an affair, we'll always be the ones who broke up his family. Even if his wife forgave him, she would never treat my daughter as her own. If I give him "ammo", somewhere along the line, he would be putting my daughter in a "war zone".
I really dont want to do this and risk giving up my child and/or putting her in this difficult situation.
What should I do? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

i'm gonna be completely blunt with you right now, you should know better then to be intimate with him since he is a married man!!! His wife should really know the truth it might hurt her but at least its better then her being in the dark and thinking hes the greatest guy on earth when in reality he isnt. Your better off going to court with this so he that he knows his boundries, hire a good lawyer cause you will need it. And if he leaves his wife for you dont be fooled by that because he will do the same thing to you as he did with his wife. he's nothing more then a cheater, liar, and to be honest with you redflegs pop up everywhere with this man, he is no good for you or your child

I would suggest you first stop being intimate with the man.All he is doing is taking advantages of you.Being the father of your child you surely got a soft spot for him but you should be strong and resist.people with money,especially millionaire are proud to ahve affairs and  making children outside marriage.And also be sure that they would do anything not to break their legal family.I am telling this from experience because I have afrend who is like that and is a millionaire.He got children outside marriage and is very proud.Well I kind of studied him.
The man you having affair I don't think he would like things to go in court as this will create scandal.Maybe he wants to be sure the child is his for his own satisfaction.If you got many doubts about it you can ask a psychic reading from our forum.They will surely help in this.As for the child you should put in mind that she is only yours.She doesn't mean anything for the father.If he would have cared he would have met her often and get to know her.by doping the paternity tests he must have been thinking if one day you might blackmail him with the child and so on.or maybe you are using the child to get money from him.all these should be going through his mind.

I think you should go and live away with your child and don't accept the money for your self respect.the money he is giving you is not alot for him.He is just having a nice time outside marriage and giving the money for fear you might tell someone.

hope i could help here and a huge hug.
dhav

You need to take care of you and your child.  You may have a soft spot, but you aren't partners with the father.  
You need to do what you need to protect your child and take good care of you.  
You probably need to consult a lawyer in your area.  
Please stop taking care of him.  I know you have a soft spot for him.  Your most important responsibility it to your child and yourself.  He is responsible for his decisions and the consequences.

He does have a responsibility for child support.  You need to make sure you get it.  It's important.