well to start me and my sons dad arn't together we were supposed to be getting married before i ended up pregent in 05 but four months into the pregency he left me i had complications with the perengcy and couldn't work but in march 06 a month eairly i had my beutifule baby boy. any way now it's 08 and he's going to be 2 his dad has sort of been spending time with him and i really want him to know our son and for our son to know him but he dose this thing were he'll take him for a couple days and then tell me that he'll see him on the weekends since he dosn't really have anyone to watch him while he's at work and i understand that but then theres times that i'll have our son all ready to go with him and he'll call me up and say he's not comeing to get him when i ask him why he just tells me that he dosn't want to and i have to go and tell my son that his daddy isn't comeing and my son ends up upset and crys and crys still amazes me just how much kids do understand even at that age and i try to comfort him and hold him and it makes me upset to see my son so upset and i have no clue what to do about it i can't change my ex i know that he would have to decied to do that i've tried talking to him and telling him that he's hurting our son but it dosn't seem to be doing any good i love my son very much and  he's a happy boy with mommy most of the time but i wish his dad would wake up and relize what his missing out on

Hi LadyBloodMoon,

A huge hug to you.


It must be hard for you both for the father not to be present.Hope the father got to know what he is doing and begin taking his reposibility son.I will pray to my angels for you both.The kid needs his daddy.

dhav

First of all, I will give you a Great Grandpa hug and at the same time congratulate you for avoiding to marry this guy!

It is sad what happen to your kid, but if he loves his father, then your main task must be to support him, like you tell you do, and not try to talk him away from seeing him.

As long as your son is young, he will need his father figure, but when he starts to mature, his father might be paid back due to the many broken promises.

Your situation is not unique, I have a daughter who was in the same situation as you. That Grand child is now 27, and she fully understands what her father has done, but that has been true her own experience and not true "bad talk from her mother"

She is now allowing her father to have contact on her rules, and now I believe the father is the suffering part.

I wish you both good luck, and also a big Hug to you both!

thanks for the encorgement and yes i suport my son i also understand how he feels and will feel in the future if his father dosn't wake up which i really do hope he does. my own father was never there for me after my parents devorced i can't recall any times that he was anyway and people other then my mother used to tell me what a jerk my father was i hated hearing it and so i tell people that are around my son not to say hurtful things about his dad around him and i never talk bad about his father when he's around maybe to my best friend when were alone but never in front of my son i try to take my example form my mother she's a smart lady even if she did annoy me by always seeming to be right lol

Hi ladybloodmoon

A HUGE HHHUUUGGG, positive energy and love to you and you son.

My 3rd ex did this to his 2 kids,(my younger 2). I did just what you are doing, making excuses for him
and not talking bad about him.
What made it worse, my 2nd ex (my older 2), has always been a great father and presence in their lives, this made my younger ones feel worse.

As they all got older, my younger 2 realized on their own how their dad lies to them,(especially now as teens). My 2nd ex has always taken all 4 of my kids.

I hope he will change. It is going to hard on you, but you are doing right, and your son will always know you were the one there for him. The rewards are many, just a tough road to get over.

PM me if you would like to talk.

Another hug for you both.
Lots of love.
Karlene