Seems to me that you need to redefine a friend. A friend is not someone that kicks you when your down, a friend is one that pulls you back to your feel. A friend is one that stands behind you against others, then in private tells you how you can improve yourself. They see your faults and accept you anyway. Do you have a friend? I am quite old but can count on one hand the true friends I have had in my life. There are those that come and go but a true friend may come and go but when you need them they are always but a call away. If you need a hug consider it offered, if you need a shoulder to cry on let m know! If you need an ear to listen to you I am there. You have but to ask.

When I was younger, I said something to a "friend" in trust.  It was my truth about my father getting married.  It is still my truth.  
The friend knew a friend of my father's new partner and told her what I said and of course it got back to my father.
After 2 weeks of sitting on it my 3x Scorpio father came to my business and entered and ripped my up one side and down the other.  I don't remember the words, I do remember the feelings, the humiliation.  He told me she was now his family, not me, there was no room for me.  He made me call her and apologize and left.  I was devastated.  I felt betrayed.  I was humiliated.  I also got little support. I put myself into a jail inside myself and punished myself.  For years I would get together with them and was treated as an unwelcome  guest.  He would get angry with me about things and just rip me apart.  I finally started learning that is not love.
He never forgave me.
I have spent years forgiving and forgiving myself and finally realized I didn't need to be the jail I put myself in and I didn't need to punish myself.  
I have made intentional family.  Friends I trust who accept me for who I am, warts and all ( I am a witch ) friends who love me and treat me with respect, love and friendship.
I learned a lesson that even tho I love someone, they may not love ME, who I am, in return.  
Even tho a label is used to define the relationship, it doesn't mean I am safe in that relationship.
I love my dad and in his own way he loves me.  I don't trust him.  I wish I could.  That is not a statement about me, it is a very sad statement about him. . Yes, I have forgiven and AND I have learned to take care of myself. I pick my intentional family careful, I pick my friends carefully and I have a bucket full of acquaintances I really enjoy and like.  

Please, take yourself out of your jail.  You don't need to be there.  Forgive yourself.  Forgive them and learn the lesson you need to learn.  The faster the lesson is learned the fewer times you need to get the lesson.
My heart goes out to you.  Upgrade your friends. It looks like you have quite a few here.

tourbi, Your sharing was quite inspiring, I am a Druid and so am a keeper of wisdom. I find your statement about needing to upgrade friends to be quite true. Many there are than need to do that. Friends can become like garments. Though they may go out of style you keep the ones that fit, and the ones that no longer fit you put aside. You address the issue that she has many friends here, and that is true, but then dear Lass so do you.
May Brigid bless you in all you do and keep you safe and happy too!

Oh my, Druid_of_Ark, Thank you.  I am honored.  You left me speechless.