
Hello, Wewek, nice to meet you.
I have the same problem and I am still trying to get a hold on it. The reason it is so hard to let go, I believe, is that the adrenaline high is a bit like a drug that makes us feel powerful and ready to eat the world for the duration of the ire attack. So I tend to feed the fury with more upsetting thoughts until I am utterly beyond control. Once I reach that point, I just have to wait for the adrenaline to filter back out of my bloodstream.
There are several explanations why this happens in the first place. One is having a very low frustration threshold: we go through life expecting everything to be exactly to our liking, just like babies, and we are ready to holler and wail at the first sign of discomfort.
Another is purely chemical: if one is overly sensitive to glucose, as I am, then eating sweets will make me feel really bad a while later. First I feel suddenly tired, then really hungry for more sweets and very irritated.
As you very well pointed out, the down side to all this is hurting those around us, not to speak of the damage we do to our liver.
So, try eating less sugar and white floured foods (they tried that in some prisons and they say it really worked in lowering the aggression rate) and, above all, try to lower your expectations, specially involving the behavior of those around you.
I am trying to do the same. I will let you know if I make any progress. Cheers!
