| Cheri Blossom wrote: |
I wonder why I am told that I need to love myself. Why I have little to no self-confidence. This is not the first time I have heard this. I want to defend myself and plead not guilty. Maybe I don't love myself, but I don't think Im all that bad either. I like being around people and they like me. Id like to think Im funny and get people to smile. But when I am alone with myself, I am not the best company for me to be around. I see sadness in my eyes now. The sparkle isn't there. I have such a big heart, and it is so hard to be still, I am so afraid of being hurt, that I don't realize Im the one who is causing myself such pain. The little child inside me is so sensitive and afraid. No safe place to rest. I know my current relationship has ripped me apart, I want so much to be able to relax and rest. I want to feel safe. I love Tom so much. I also know that If we are going to make this work then there are a lot of things that I need to accept about the way Tom loves. I almost feel as if I have some curse of some kind that prevents me from ever being content and happy in love. I have so much work to do on myself, I don't know where to start, and I don't know if I can mend what is broken. I am a mess. I will begin today to find myself, and try to put me back together again. I want to stop this crazy cycle and feel whole.
Im also falling a sleep as im writing this, so I hope it is making sense. Thank you again and I welcome any support, advice, and recommendations. |
Hi Cheri Blossom,

Sorry didn't mean to preach to you. I don't think that you are all that bad either, but from what you have already said you do have a some emotional issues to work through, believe me you're not on your own, I think we all would tell you that we are not perfect, everyone have issues to deal with. It has taken me a long time to deal with mine, and some I still haven't worked through. I am sure that others love you and enjoy your company, but it important to love yourself and like who you are. Rhutobello and the others that use this site have a lot of wisdom and advice to give to others, so you have made a good start by logging onto this site. Take one step at a time. Good luck, keep us posted on your progress. Big Hug
Dreamfairy