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Posts: 7 · Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 12:20 am

Quote:

WELL I'VE BEIN IN RELATIONSHIPS THAT HAS DONE ME WRONG IN THE PAST. AND IT HAS AFFECTED ME FOR A LONG TIME. A GUY THAT I GOT SET UP ON A BLIND DATE WITH GOT ME PREGNANT THE FIRST TIME WE MET. CALL ME A SLUT BUT I THINK IT WAS MORE A CRY FOR SOME KIND OF LOVE FROM SOMEONE. MY PARENTS WERE REALLY NEVER AROUND EITHER THEY WERE BOTH WORKING TOO MUCH OR THEY JUST WAS FIGHTING AND LEAVING 8 OF US TO WATCH EACHOTHER. WELL THERE IS 4 BOYS AND 4 GIRLS I STAND THE MIDDLE OF THE GIRLS. THE BROTHER THAT IS ABOVE ME HAS PASSED AWAY WHEN I WAS 12 AND HE WAS MY PARTNER IN THE LINE UP. EVERYONE ELSE IS WAY OLDER AND THE YOUNGER ONES ARE DOING THEIR OWN THING. SO AS I GREW OLDER I HAD TO LEARN ALL THE THINGS I KNOW NOW FROM EITHER FRIENDS OR OTHER MOM'S AND DAD'S THAT WOULD GIVE ME SOME KIND OF ADVICE. WELL MY LUCK WITH MEN SUCK. I HAD THE BABY AND HE IS 10YRS OLD NOW. I HAD HIM WHEN I WAS 17YRS OLD. THE WHOLE PREGNANCY WAS FULL OF UNLOVING INCIDENTS THAT TODAY NOW IN THE PRESENT HAS HAD ME TO TRUST NO GUY I HAVE DATED. AND IT HAS DESTROYED ME FOR 10YRS OF MY LIFE. WELL AS YEARS WENT ON I WANTED TO MEET THAT ONE SPECIAL GUY THAT HAD THE CARE AND LOVE THAT MY BATTERED SOUL NEEDED. JUST SO HAPPEN I FINALLY MET THE MAN OF MY DREAMS. HE HAD THE LOOKS THE PERSONALITY AND OF COURSE THE LOVE AND CARE I NEEDED. FOR ME AND HIM IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. HE PROPOSED TO ME TO OUR SONG ON CHRISTMAS EVE IN THE SHOPPING MALL. IT WAS A COMPLETE SHOCK,BUT THE MOMENT WAS PRICELESS. WELL WE STAYED WITH EACH OTHER FOR 5 YRS BUT IN THE 5YRS HIS MOM HAD SOME IF'S AND BUT'S ABOUT ME. AND REALLY I DID NOTHING WRONG TO HER OR HER FAMILY. BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND WHERE SHE IS COMING FROM. I HAVE A SON AND I KNOW THE DAY OF MY IF'S AND BUT'S ABOUT HIS CHOICE IN WOMEN WILL BE THERE ALSO. WELL TO CUT A LONG STORY SHORT ME AND MY DREAM MAN SPLIT IN 2006. IT WAS THE MOST DEVASTATING TIME OF MY LIFE. IT WAS LIKE MY DREAM ENDED AND THE FEELING OF LOOSING SOMETHING YOU KNOW YOU CAN NEVER SEE OR TOUCH OR EVEN RECAPTURE HAS VANISHED INTO THE DEPTHS OF THE DARKEST PLACE IN THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE. I CRIED FOR 3MTHS. I CHECKED MYSELF IN TO THERAPY AND IT HELPED A LITTLE.UNTIL I SAW HIM....WITH HIS NEW APPLE OF HIS EYE. I HAD TO CONTAIN MYSELF FROM REACHING OUT AND REMOVING HER HEAD FROM HER SHOULDERS. I CASUALLY WALKED PASS LIKE I DID NOT SEE HIM AND HE BLURTED OUT MY NAME. I LOOKED AND ACTED SURPRISED EVEN THOUGH MY TEARS WERE READY TO START RAINING ON HIM LIKE THE FLOOD GOD SENT TO EARTH FOR 40DAYS AND NIGHTS. I SMILED AND HE INTRODUCED HIS NEW....FRIEND. I POLITELY ACKNOWLEDGED HER AND SMILED THEN EXSCUSED MY SELF FROM THE SCENE. I WENT TO THE BATHROOM AND CRIED. I FELT THE PAIN THAT AGONIZING PAIN THAT I THOUGHT I HAD RID MY SOUL FROM. THEN I FELT A ARM WRAP AROUND MY SHOULDER AND EMBRACED ME WITH WARMTH AND COMFORT. MY SISTER. SHE GRABBED ME AND HUGGED ME. AFTER ALL THESE YEARS GOING THROUGH ALL THE PAIN WITH THE GUY WHO GOT ME PREGNANT AND LEFT ME FOR MY BEST FRIEND AND NEVER ACKNOWLEDEGED MY CHILD TO THE ONE I THOUGHT WAS THE GUY THAT EVERY MOTHER WOULD TELL THEIR DAUGHTER ABOUT THAT WAS OUT THERE MADE FOR US. MY SISTER GAVE ME THE HUG I WAS LONGING FOR AND WHISPERED IN MY EAR "IT'S GOING TO BE FINE, DON'T WORRY AND BE STRONG. I PROMISE I WON'T LET GO." AS I HEARD THOSE WORDS I FELT A SENSE OF POSITIVE AND LOVE FLOWING THROUGH. AND SHE WET A WARM PAPER TOWEL AND HANDED IT TO ME. I FELT A LITTLE BETTER. WHY CAUSE I WAS NOT ALONE. I HAD MY SISTER. AND SHE CARED AND SHE LOVED ME NO MATTER IF I WAS WRONG OR IF IT WAS MY FAULT SHE WOULD ALWAYS BE THERE. SO NOW IN THIS PRESENT TIME I'M DOING A LOT BETTER AND I JUST WANTED TO SHARE THIS STORY WITH YOU PEOPLE EVEN THOUGH WE ARE ALL COMPLETE & TOTAL STRANGERS.BUT I THINK THIS IS A GREAT FORUM FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME AND LIKE YOU TO EXPRESS OUR FEELINGS AND TO LET EACHOTHER KNOW WHAT WE WANT AND NEED IN LIFE. AND I THINK THIS "I NEED A HUG" FORUM IS GREAT. SO THANK YOU FOR LISTENING AND I HOPE THAT EVERYONE WHO IS FEELING REALLY DOWN IN LIFE ABOUT SOMETHING THAT THEY GET THAT HUG THAT ACTUALLY NEED TO MAKE THEM FEEL A WHOLE LOT BETTER. HERE IS A GREAT BIG HUG FROM ME TO ALL OF YOU....

XOXO,

SINNAMON

Posts: 7545 · Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 9:01 am

And here comes a biggggg Grandpa huuuuug back to you.

Yes love can many times be hard to tackle and that might be the reason why it feel so good when you get the real one.

Your story are the story of many girls of today....yea even of people who have been married for ages....where one part split up for something greener and put the other part in great pain.

The fact that you have a child shall not be any hindering if you met someone who really love you----because the child is a part of you.
If you met someone that don't include your child....then be careful...because then the guy is just out in order to own you....not to share with you.

Always try to look for something positive, be good to yourself....work on your self-confidence and self-respect (I am not saying they are low).
By doing this you beam security and you will then attract the same ....in my opinion.

Good luck to you and another bigg huuuugggg!

Posts: 1274 · Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 10:41 am

I am sending you one of my HUGE hugs - hope it helps a little

Brightest Blessings

Sarah

Posts: 423 · Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 1:21 pm

Hi SINNAMON

I want to say I rather enjoyed reading your story.... it was going one way ... and then you really surprised me when it went into a whole other direction as you turned it into being about how much a HUG helped you!
Heres a big hug for you. (((HUG))) You are adorable.

Welcome to Mysticboard... I think the "I need a hug" section of this forum is wonderful as well. May you feel at home quickly and make many new friends here.

P E A C E
Evie

Posts: 7 · Posted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 1:44 pm

A "BIG" thank you to all of you Lunarcraft, Evie, and Rhutobello. I love the first post that is some positive words I needed to hear. I use to feel all alone and thought no one even understood me and the way I put things. But I know from all the warmness and kindness I feel as of right now is going to be a really good thing for me in my life.

xoxo,

sinn

P.S. : hugs are excellent to give to someone who needs one.
But sometimes the heartless can ruin such a wonderful comforting feeling
for everyone. I'm glad that I feel that feeling.

HUGS 4 YOU FROM ME