Hi rachredhair:
So you want to find your way back to psychic awareness. I'd love to share my advice...,
Let's start by changing that intention from "psychic" awareness to "spiritual" awareness and let's throw in the desire for achieving joy because, ultimately that's what it's all about.

I sense a great deal of lost faith from you. A few big and lots of little disappointments that seemed to come out of no where and just kept racking up against you. You've been feeling as though the entire world is moving around you faster than you can keep up with. I also sense that you've been harboring frustration on the borderline of anger and you're exhausted.

You wish the world would just stop.., even if only for a moment just so you can catch your breath. You've been feeling overwhelmed and abandoned and the scary part is that you really don't know why. You can't seem to single out or pin point the source of your dismay and every time you finally get a grip on life something else happens and you end up finding yourself trapped in a no-win situation all over again.

I'll tell you what I feel is the primary culprit behind the chaos surrounding you. It's your attitude. When I say attitude I am referring to the way you've been perceiving yourself and your life. You've developed a habit of being pessimistic.

You allowed yourself to become weak in the face of adversity. Somewhere at sometime in your past you got the crazy notion that you were undeserving, unwanted, and unworthy of true joy. There was a time when you wanted someone's attention so badly that you were willing to deny yourself your right to high esteem. Instead of declaring your greatness you sold out and bought into someone else's ignorant opinion of you.

Some experiences you may not have any control over however, it is totally up to you to decide how those experiences will affect your quality of life. No one has the power to strip us of our joy.  Even in the face of tragedy and grief.

When you take the time to look at the world around you and see it all for the miracle it is,  you will begin to see yourself for the miracle that you are and have always been. In this awareness you will discover a joy of unfathomable might and there isn't a single evil deed, act of hate, force, or oppression that could ever take that joy away from you.

You are a magnificent being and you are precious. You were not put here on this planet so that you could suffer. You were put here so that you could experience love in a way that only a human can.

Let me wrap it all up for you. You were concerned about your psychic awareness. Now, when you get the chance, I want you to step out side and try to lose and then regain the world around you. You may need to start small.., perhaps a room in your house. Go into it, stand in it and try to lose the room.

Can you see what I'm getting at here? Psychic awareness cannot be lost nor gained. Like the room and the outdoors, psychic awareness is something that you expand into. So.., what I really think you want is to experience Spirit at a deeper more intimate level.

You can do this and build on your life's joy all in one motion.  The answer is SERVICE. Serving others is the way! If you want to experience true joy and a true connection with Spirit.., start looking for ways to serve humanity. Anything you can think of doing and can enjoy as well.

But there is my answer.., SERVICE.

LLJ.:
AJ