Thanks Dayanera for your suggestion. I agree she doesnt talk about her mom because of taking sides. If we ask her how is mommy or her grandma or any family member from the moms side..her answer would be she is fine. While visiting my brother she calls her mom but if somebody enters the room she lowers her voive or she just finishes her conversation.

She is nearly 9 yrs old. She enjoys more at her dads place and she has said that at times she doesnt want to go home. But at her moms its more routine life, school, studies...which os prety understandable. But at Dad's its more fun,games activites because the time stayed with him is short.

But I think she is handling it really well. She opens to her step mom and I think we just have to giver her time and patience. Sometimes the situation isint as grave as it is perceived to be.

Thank you dayanera. Life must be prety hectic with 6 kids. How did you step kids adjust to you. Just wondering. Was it difficult for them???

my step kids had a me around for a few years before we marry as Dad's girlfriend..Their Mother was very unhappy about me in general..It was hard for them at first..But then they live with us all the summers.. holidays..week-ends..We were friends and still are ..I never try to take the place of their Mother in anyway..They never called me Mom and that was fine with me..My kids never call my husband, Dad. but they have a pet name for him that they use..Our house had many more rules than thier mom"s house but they always wanted to come ...It isn't tha rules that stop kids.. it is how they feel about the people with the rules or no rules..All of the kids are out on their own now...Married... have kids..all the grandkids call me grandma and my husband grandpa..they don't even think much about the extra set of grandparents cause it has always been that way..My step kids Mom die 2 years ago and they all came to me to be comforted . So I would say that tells a lot for how we are together...It all takes time and all kinds of patients..The biggest thing is to really listen to what the kids are telling you even if they aren't saying it in the right words..And hope you can do what is needed for them...As I said before you can only do what you can do and hope it is right....

Yours sure is a success story. I think time takes care of it all. Its adjustment for everybody.



So true !

Unfortunately so often parents play the children against each other .. mom said dad said ... because its there revenge ..or the "final word for them"

the most important thing for the children is give them very much love and install faith in them.eventually they will know what is good for them when they will begin thinking with their own mind.Dayanera is very lucky about her success story