Wow, I read through my post.  I think it was the end of the day and I was tired or something.

I think you summed up what I was trying to say really well SSR.  I certainly wasn't trying to imply a strict regiment of discipline to keep the kids in line.  I was trying to say around that age it seems to me kids really push the boundaries, and it is important for them to do so, and it is just as important for the parents to let them know what those boundaries are in a firm but caring manner.

Such as peeing in the mop bucket every time it gets filled up.  Sure it is hilarious, but it is still a boundary and you have to force a straight face so they don't get the idea you find it as funny as it actually is.  I don't know that is exactly what I was trying to say... I think it is about being a firm, but warm and loving parent.  But not backing down when they turn on the water works to pull at your heart strings, but they should be having a cup of juice before they go to bed!  Or else they will be on an energy rush at bed time...  Such a bad scenario!  And saying no to your children can be such a difficult and painful thing to do.  Part of the reason why I take my son running in the pram.  He pushes me hard and I don't want to disappoint.  "Faster daddy!  Faster!"

Does that illustrate what I am trying to say?  I don't know...  I am tired again lol

Oh yes, I totally understand what you're saying on the raising part when they're 2. Though I have no children of my own yet, I have a few memories left of that age (yeah I know it's rare). My first memory was of my 2nd birthday and has nothing to do with this subject, but I have 2 more, and twice it involved my mom telling me not to do something (as a warning) and I can even remember how it felt for me when she did that... I didn't even contemplate of doing something but just because she mentioned it is felt like my brain went bright red and all I could think was doing exactly that which she had told me not to do. It was something I simply could not resist. Just the idea became like an obsession that I had to do. And so I ended up doing it, twice, and got punished over it. She warned me not to draw on the first page of a storybook, and told me not to unwrap and open the birthday gift for my cousin. The strange thing was that the thought hadn't even crossed my mind to do either of those things, until she warned me off beforehand (probably because I had done it before I reached that age).

My mom used to tell me bedtime stories she made up about two brothers called Pim and Pom, and in those stories their mom would go to a shop or do something else and warn Pim and Pom not to go to the attic and try the wedding clothes in a trunk, or something else. She in fact of course just gave them ideas of what naughty things they could do and they would end up doing it, but wreck the clothes, or have some accident and would be found out. I think that it was partly my mom's joke on herself after she realized that sometimes she had simply provoked my 2 year old brain wired to try out exactly that which is forbidden.

Because of those memories I suspect that a 2 year olds brain is indeed wired to do the opposite of what they are forbidden to do... and in that way learn that they will be found out, that there are consequences and such a warning is given to prevent the consequences of ever happening. It seems a phase where children have to learn how their ego and wants may be in social confict with their surroundings (if not physical conflict, aka dangerous), and the first lessons in finding a balance.

And imo 15-16 year old brains go through a similar phase again... not to what is forbidden, but just do what they like even if it annoys somebody else. And just like a 2 year old they refuse to admit to what they did, blaming others, denial, etc even if you had your nose on it.

Funny, but also frustrating periods :-p