I am glad I read this post before I posted on the other dream.

SweetSunRay has said exactly what I wanted to say and more in a far better way, I don't think I should go and put my foot in this now.

But I will say between all these dreams there is a recurring theme of devastating events and destruction on the verge of coming about, but not yet manifest, or narrowly averted.  This is just my impression of what you have stated, but get the feeling it may apply to your scenario.  I am not sure who made this quote but it sticks in my mind.

"They who move a mountain, starts by carrying away small stones."

I don't think it is even possible to change society in a single lifetime, let alone purge what is deemed as the darker sides of society ever.  But what every single person does, even the smallest act, it makes a difference.  It can have big impacts that you may never even see.  From my reading of your posts you are looking to make a big splash in that big picture.  You seem driven towards that.  Its not a bad thing, but it is a mammoth task.  Its not impossible but it is a lot of work, and not everybody will want to put their energy towards that goal, and as SSR says not everyone is ready for it.  There are so many different people out there and each and every one has different drives and desires.

In my youth I had a lot of people telling me I could be a male model, and get a lot of money from it.  It could lead to bigger and better things and I was crazy not to take it up.  But that is them.  They want a big house on the beach with a ferarri, fine wine and a piece of fancy cheese.  I would be miserable in that lifestyle, doing that for a living.  Firstly I didn't have the ego for it (like to hide in the corners away from the spotlight), and secondly I value my analytical scientific mind, and considering I spend most of my time at work I will want to enjoy doing what I do.  In a job where I dont' use my brain as much as my body (though I might have enjoyed the artistry of modelling) I think I would have quickly got sick of it.  I dont' want a big house and fancy things.  I want a nice small house filled with happy memories and the pitter patter of small feet.  And thats what I am getting out of life.

When I did decide to follow my dream of a simple family life I had people tell me it was stupid and I was throwing my life away.  My best friend at the time actually told me how sad she was for me, how my life was over.  She said some very blunt hurtful things about my family to my face.  To this day when I so much as see her from a distance I want to puke.  All because she didn't understand that I didn't want the same thing she does (that being the big house on the beach).  What she said still hurts a lot, and she has never shown any compassion at all for it, and I don't think she cares how much it hurt to hear those things from someone you once considered your closest friend.  I got hurt, and lost a lot of friends over following my dreams, but like you, I cut ties with whatever stood in between me and those dreams.  It is part of the sacrifice I made for the life I have now.  And I would do it again given the choice, but it would have been far better to share my gifts with those people, instead of forging new ties.

But what I am trying to illustrate here is that people have different drives and desires, and purposes in life.  The spiritual drive is a personal thing, it is something to be savoured internally, you can share it externally, but it is not for everyone in the same way nor at the same time because different people have these different drives.  I probably would have had the same reaction with someone who was upset with me because I was not baptising my children in their faith even though I am not of any religious affiliation (which has happened, but only asked "when will he be baptised" - and not pursued after I explained that I was not a Catholic).

In terms of bringing up those around you, I think that is a worthy ideal, but how you go about that is important.  I think if you want to bring those around you up into believing that they are capable of more, is not by talking them into it, but by being that shining beacon of inspiration.  Lead by example, not by mouth.  That is what I suggest.  Whether or not you take that up is entirely up to you.

Best wishes,
Rook

Thanks Rook, that was really helpful, Im glad you see where I am coming from. I especially appreciate "example vs mouth". You say you regret forgoing those ties... you also say that old friend makes you puke. Do you think it would have been healthy for you to continue surrounding yourself with people like her? How would you have gone about blocking out her energy/ negativity while still being connected to her and still being true to yourself. That is my main concern. Also, people are around us so we can learn/ share in their experiences. how feasible do you think it is to take from someones experience/ learn from a person with negative qualities/ energies without being affected by them. I think that is what i need to learn most. I push people away because I am unable to deal with them otherwise, many people have messy relationships that are detrimental but they dont let go, I avoid that at all costs and like things clear cut.

Hi Flower

I do regret cutting those ties.  You don't realise the value of people until they are gone.  What happened occured because she tried to impose her views values and beliefs onto me.  She failed to recognise that I was a different person with different desires and a different destiny from her.  I don't even mind what she thought of my decision.  It was how she expressed it, with no regard for my feelings and emotional wellbeing.  She isn't even a negative person, I would say she is quite positive, confident, and quite probably going to be a high achiever herself.  But as you say, it would not be healthy for me emotionally to see her around when she has made such hurtful remarks about how I choose to live my life, that has left me with emotional scarring.

I would never actually consider blocking out anothers energy.  To me people who are in a negative frame of mind are in need of support, and I have regularly helped people through such times in the past.  I feel good about myself when I help these people, not by telling them what to do, but by listening to their problems, and being there for them.  I have had a few people come back to me in the past saying that I helped them so much when they needed it most, and inspired and helped them to get through what they were going through, but to me I felt like I did nothing but listen.  It is heart warming to hear these things, and very rewarding for me.  I can do this without being overwhelmed because my focus is not on making their problems my problems and trying to solve them, but simply by being an outlet, someone they can go to and forget these things.  Enjoy themselves for a bit.  People are usually quite profound at learning lessons themselves, and if their problems are solved for them, they don't learn a thing.

I think this is partly what I was saying about example v mouth as well as what Sweet Sun Ray touched on about knowing what we can teach.  Teachers are not there to tell people what to do.  They are there simply as guides.  They point the way, suggest things, not simply handing out answers.  It is not until they have traversed the path themselves that they should guide others down it.  Otherwise they are like the blind leading the blind.  And even if a guide has traversed the path people have to respect them, believe that they have walked it, before they will come to the teacher / guide for advice.

I think Sweet Sun Ray's post delves very well into what the dream is trying to show you, which is what this is all about in the end.  I think it is definitely worth re-reading.

The people who I cut ties with were those who meddled in my life, who acted for me. They were people I met when I was learning crucial things in life regarding balancing out emotions with reality and philosophy. And as I have knack of almost always taking the most difficult road, this sometimes caused people to think they should solve it for me. Aside from the fact that their meddling always backfired and messed up what I was trying to do and achieve, I could not abide by the fact that they would take the experience away from me. I cut them out of my life, not because they were negative (they hardly were), but they were, as rook said, themselves blind (but thinking they had vision) trying to lead me when I neither asked nor welcomed it, because they could not respect the boundary of where my life and responsibility to it starts. Most of them returned back into my life years later, or at least attempted contact again out of their own accord, and I welcomed it, because by then they had learned to recognize on their own accord where their responsibility stopped when it comes to the lives of other people.

As for "negative" traits... I don't believe in positive and negative traits really, just negatively affecting/destructive versus constructive/positive behaviour and actions. Most people have good intentions, and everyone has vices, flaws and talents. But sometimes, depending in situations, a vice can turn out to be helpful, while a talent may be used negative. For example, most people would associate "stubborn" with a "flaw". But stubborness enables that person to have a strong will which in some situations may be a virtue. Likewise, being empathic may be a virtue, but it can make a person lose their own identity too.

Anyway, I also wanted to say I do realize you want to protect yourself as well as are concerned about the wellbeing of the world. And if you take on the responsibilities of the world and other humans' lives (which is in fact their own responsibility), then yes you would end up being drained. I don't think it's necessarily their flaw. You can be around insecure people who struggle emotionally to get through life without feeling drained by not considering their issues your problem to solve.

I wish you the very best