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sweetsunray
Age: 35 Zodiac: 
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Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 4:16 pm |
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When it happened (8 years ago) I had no idea what it was, never heard of it - until I described it and a friend told me I had experienced a Kundalini. I was in total despair of the state of my life, hurting immensely, and felt like I could not bear it another day, and in my pain cried for help to the ceiling in the dead of night. My main guardian
(does he exist or is he a projection of a higher self? no matter, the result is the same) exposed himself to me as I fell in a sort of trance (I was used to meditating/self hypnosis and exploring self somewhat for two years though), and when I had calmed down after his initial caretaking, hugging and explanation, he activated me sexually (he/higher self was making love to me)... And then it shot upward... I could not move, speak or think... for at least half an hour I was consumed with an orgasmic fire going up and down, up and down, centering majorly from the solar... For weeks I burst with energy and hardly slept more than 2 hours a day. The slighest thing could evoke it again. After 2 weeks I was out of my depression and abyss and back on the ground with both 2 feet.
I joined a meditation circle with my best friend who explained to me what it was that I had experienced and we had undescribable journeys for several years, and discovered so much about the chakras. I've had several more kundalinis, especially at the start of this process, but they lessened in time, or the cleansing process shifted to other purposes. Once the cleansing/burning goes beyond the solar, it starts to feel differently.
Only years later did I even start to investigate the term kundalini, and learned how people have tried to attain it, as well as people having a kundalini syndrome and negative symptoms in some cases because of it.
And I feel grateful and humbled it was given to me when I was at my wits' end to my benefit, my life's benefit and in consequence the people I live for. After the first kundalini and recovery from the depression I became a teacher (which I experience as a calling) and adventurous backpacking tourleader making people aware of the world out there and how to deal with it conscientiously.
The last of my major inner developments is where my heart was grounded and has taken over the rule of my lower chakras.
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