At a Scale Convention.

At the scale manufacturers' convention, people often wanted to weigh themselves on different scales to see if they agreed. However, some visitors abstained, not wishing to advertise their weight. A smooth-talking representative coaxed a woman onto his scale by promising her that he would not look and that she could even cover the digital display so only she could see her weight.

She finally stood on the scale, whereupon a loud, mechanical voice from within the machine announced: "One hundred and sixty-three."

LOL that would be my worst nightmare,haha.

Heres a joke i got in an email.

A blonde lady motorist was about two hours from San Diego when she
was flagged down by a man whose truck had broken down. The man walked

up to the car and asked, "Are you going to San Diego?"

"Sure," answered the blonde, "do you need a lift?"

"Not for me. I'll be spending the next three hours fixing my truck.
My problem is I've got two chimpanzees in the back which have to be
taken to the San Diego Zoo. They're a bit stressed already so I don't
want to keep them on the road all day. Could you possibly take them
to the zoo for me?

I'll give you $100 for your trouble."

"I'd be happy to," said the blonde. So the two chimpanzees were
ushered into the back seat of the blonde's car and carefully strapped
into their seat belts. Off they went.

Five hours later, the truck driver was driving through the heart of
San Diego when suddenly he was horrified! There was the blonde
walking down the street and holding hands with the two chimps, much
to the amusement of a big crowd.
With a screech of brakes he pulled off the road and ran over to the
blonde. What the hell are you doing here?" he demanded, "I gave you
$100 to take these chimpanzees to the zoo."

"Yes, I know you did," said the blonde," but we had money left
over so now we're going to Sea World.

Good ones you 2...

Nice~!! my hair is blond again.. Ha-Ha~!!  

And that scale I would remove the voice box out of it when none was around..
I would make it sing Yankee doodle...

Thanks for sharing~!!

Game Of Intelligence

There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.

Laughs.. Good one~!!  
He should of just handed her $45.00 back.. rofflmbo~!!